“Oh my God, he’s just annoying,” Jenny groused as she rolled her eyes and sipped her drink from the pink straw sticking out next to a little umbrella. “Why do you still live there with him anyway? Can’t you just, like, move in with Tred already and be over him?”

She flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder and waved at someone passing by with a bright smile and nose wrinkle. It was her, so called, signature smile. That was the smile that let them know they were okay to approach and talk to her. Smiling and arched her perfectly manicured eyebrows meant to keep walking. Unfortunately, not many understood Jenny’s code and she was merely labeled a ‘spoiled bitch.’

She stopped at a small drink table and waved the people standing near-by away with her hand, taking it over. “I know, you come move in with me. It’s not like we don’t have the room and now that Garret is out of the picture,” she rolled her eyes again, “we can hang together like old times. Wouldn’t that be fun?”

Bridget forced her cheeks to lift in the attempt of forming a smile, knowing there was no way in Hell she would move in with Jenny. At one point, they were inseparable and on the cover of every tabloid published for their partying. But after she sobered up, Jenny gave her the arched eyebrow smile and waved her off – unworthy of partying since she could no longer drink.

Lately, though, that had changed since Garret broke up with her and Bridget found herself back in the clubs and party scene with the pros’ and cameras in her face. Instead of table dancing and drunk skinny-dipping, however, they discussed her friendship with Trevor and speculated on her sobriety.

“Not sure how Tred would feel about that,” she mumbled, trying to come up with something to say besides no, but any answer outside of a squealing, excited ‘yes’ would be the wrong answer.

“Right, because you don’t have a brain of your own anymore,” Jenny replied, sliding her fingers through her long blonde hair mindlessly watching the people around them. “You can’t possibly do something you think would be fun.” She turned to look at Bridget. “I think I’m starting to remember why we stopped hanging out.”

“It’s not that, Jenny,” Bridget replied, rolling her eyes as well and smiling. “Zach’s a pain in the ass and all, but he’s going back into the studio and all that, which means he won’t be around much anymore to hassle me. Although your offer was more than generous and really, it’s only a matter of time before Garret changes his mind and you won’t want me hanging around when he does, right?”

“Someone better than Garret,” she corrected and smiled. “You’re right, of course. It was generous of me.”

“Oh, completely.” Bridget agreed, and looked into the crowd wondering what she was doing there. She didn’t want this anymore. She didn’t even like the club crowd, the noise, or the publicity. She went out to prove that she could. She went to show everyone that she was more than Tred’s girlfriend and Zach’s baby sister, but she wasn’t proving much.

“Oh my God, would you look who had the nerve to show up?” Jenny asked, motioning casually across the dance floor. “Who told her she was cool enough to get in?” Bridget looked over to see Gwen, Jenny’s former best friend prior to Bridget. Another friendship trashed because one of them had a boyfriend. “Did she even have the nerve to bring the skanky boy-toy, too?”

“It looks like she’s with Garret,” Bridget said, knowing drama was unfolding before she finished the sentence.

“What a whore!” Jenny exclaimed, stomping her very expensive boot-clad foot soundlessly into the blasting music. “I can’t believe she’d do that to me!”

Bridget looked at her, expecting tears, but instead, Jenny blinked several times trying to force them on. When it didn’t work, she downed the last of her fruity drink and tossed her hair over her shoulder again. “I’m so glad you’re my friend again. You’ve been with Tred for, like, ever. I always knew Gwennie was jealous of me and Garret. At least I know you’ll never take my boyfriend.”

“Of course not, Jenny!” Bridget agreed. She could be emphatic about that because it was the complete truth. Jenny’s boyfriends were notorious for being losers and low lifes dressed in Prada. “It’s a shitty thing to do to show up with him like this when you’re still so hurt.” Bridget was a lot better than she knew. Hearing herself speak, she almost believed them. “Truly you’re much better off without him if he’d do something like this to you.”

“Not him, her!” Jenny corrected. “Garret would never do something like this to me. But she would, like, obviously.”

“Yeah, obviously,” Bridget agreed, watching Garret and Gwen dance together, their lips sucking at each others’ in a form of a kiss. It was more for tabloid photographers, she was certain. This is part of why she got drunk. It made the mundane idiocy of all this seem more bearable and dramatic.

“Gidget!” Two arms wrapped around her from behind and someone kissed her loudly on the cheek. “Gidgie! Gigi! Where the hell have you been?” She knew the voice – too well. Part of her felt the old excitement return, having been dormant for so long, it recognized the sound of promise. The other part of her recognized the sound of danger but was silenced in the roar of his laughter and excited embrace. “I didn’t think you loved me anymore.”

She laughed nervously, knowing better right from the start. She should walk away. She should leave. But Jenny came forward and hugged Jason, air-kissing both cheeks before stepping back and keeping an eye on Gwen and Garret. “Jason, can you believe how horrible they are?” she pouted. “Do you have something that will make this night better for us?”

Us? Bridget thought, but before she could finish, Jason put his thumb on her chin and she opened her mouth. He dropped a pill in easily and she swallowed it even more easily. Leave. Leave now. Get out of here. Go.

“Not addictive, Gidget-Baby,” Jason said directly in her ear as he embraced her. “And no charge. I’ve missed seeing that beautiful face of yours.”

“What about mine?” Jenny whined, pulling on Jason’s sleeve and giggling.

He kissed her cheek and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I couldn’t live without seeing your sweet face as much as I do.”

She giggled again and dropped her head against his chest. “You always make me feel so special.”

Twenty minutes later, Bridget was leaning against the wall, rubbing her palm over it’s surface and feeling every single drop of paint on it. Each tiny little drop that formed as it dried on top of another tiny little drop and it made her palm feel as if it were covered in velvet. Everything might be covered in velvet and she wanted to touch it all to see. Thank God this wasn’t addictive, part of her thought, rubbing a hand over her cheek, but she knew this wasn’t the right regardless. If Tred walked in, or Zach, she knew they’d flip out and drag her out. But maybe they’d never notice. It’s not like they could smell it, or taste it, her eyes didn’t bug out, or get red and watery. No one would ever know.

Wow, she missed the lights of a club. The way they throbbed to the beat. If she watched them closely, she could see them flicker and fade and flicker and fade. And the bass! She could feel it vibrate the air around her, feel it rise up through the floor and pulse through her from her feet. If she lifted her feet when it throbbed, it came directly through her pores.

“What are you doing?” Jenny laughed, sipping another umbrella drink that miraculously appeared in her hand. Bridget forgot how easily drinks simply appeared when she was out. It had been such a long time since she was out anywhere as un-sanitized as this.

“Can you believe he has the nerve to look over here?” Jenny asked. Her nose wrinkled in disgust and she rolled her eyes to the dancing bright lights, distracted for a moment.

“Forget him,” Bridget said defiantly. “He’s so not worth it, jenny.”

“That’s so easy for you to say! You have Tred. You don’t have to find a date anymore. You can get laid anytime you want.” Somehow Bridget knew better than to say ‘so could you.’ Instead, she tried to look apologetic and stuck her bottom lip out in a pout. Jenny smiled and put her arms around her. “Oh, stop! You know I could never really be mad at you. You’re my bestest friend ever!”

She didn’t even want to say that back to her, although she knew Jenny was waiting for her to say it. But Tred was her best friend. And she really wanted to be with him right now. Her head was starting to hurt and she was beginning to feel so tired.

“Garret’s coming over. Oh my God, pretend we’re like deep in conversation or something.” She flipped her hair again and suddenly laughed loudly. “You’re so funny!”

“Hey, Jen,” Garret said coming up behind her. “Bridget, right?” She nodded. “Thought so. You look familiar.”

“Yeah, so does that slut you’re with,” Jenny said, keeping her back to him. “Gwen, right? Thought so. What do you want, Gar?”

“I just saw you over here and thought it’d be rude if I didn’t acknowledge you, Jen,” he answered. “I didn’t want to be rude or anything since, you know, you said we’d be friends.”

She turned around and Bridget leaned against the wall, the plain, ordinary, painted, dirty wall. Her mouth was beginning to dry out, now and she felt like she was suffocating in the heat of the club – too many dancers, too crowded. The lights hurt her eyes, making them throb.

“I said? I didn’t do the breaking up! You said and I didn’t not, like, agree.” She pushed her fingers against his chest and sipped her drink. “Besides, how do I know you’re not just trying to make Gwen jealous?”

“Because, Baby,” he said, stepping closer and cocking his head to the side, flashing a smile, “she don’t mean shit to me. I been over there trying to make you jealous but you’ve been hangin’ with your new-old friend and didn’t pay me no mind, so I had to come over here.” He slid his hand through her hair and she tilted her head to the other side.

“Jenny, I think I need to get some air,” Bridget said, feeling the room begin to swim around her and grayness creeping in in a tunnel around her vision.

“Oh, okay,” Jenny said absentmindedly, barely flickering a smile over her shoulder. “In, like, a minute, okay, Gidget? I’m kind of talking now.”

“I don’t have a minute,” she said, reaching out to feel her way along the wall. “I think I might be sick.”

“Ew,” Jenny squealed, but Garret took Bridget’s arm and led her out the side entrance, followed by Jenny. He leaned her against the wall and she could feel the cooler air against her skin and fill her lungs. “So, like, Garret,” jenny said, “want to head back to my place for a little party of our own?”

“Now?” he asked, looking back at Bridget. “You think she’ll be okay?”

“You’ll be fine, won’t you, Bridget?” Jenny called, taking Garret’s hand and heading down the alleyway. “Call me! Love you! Kiss-kiss!”

When she calmed down, Bridget made her way back inside to use the ladies room. She splashed cold water on her face first and drank a few handfuls, regardless of how disgusting it tasted or what might be in it. She was thirsty, and knew she needed to drink a lot more water to get the rest of the crap Jason gave her out of her system.

With each slurp of water her head throbbed ‘stupid-stupid-stupid.’ A few girls came in behind her and snickered at her and she knew how ridiculous she looked. She wasn’t supposed to be here anymore. She didn’t belong here anymore. Never did. This was superficial. Artificial. Everything she had here was wrong and dangerous and she was never going out with Jenny again.

Eventually she called Zach, dreading what he was going to say when he picked up. “Hey,” she said, hearing tears creep into her voice, “I need you to come get me at Kilmers.”

“Kilmers?” he asked, sleepy and confused. “What’re you doing there?”

“You promised that if I ever needed help, you’d come get me. No questions asked. I need you to come get me, Zach. I don’t have enough for a cab.”

“I’ll be right there,” he answered, suddenly awake and serious. “Meet me out front.”