Oreos for Breakfast: Nick BSB Fiction

Oreos for Breakfast - Chapter 17
By The Paperbag Princess and The Pumpkin Coach

Corresponding Message Board Posts (Fictional!)

"Rache, I think you should see this…" James said quietly next to me, and I buried my head under the pillow.

"Go 'way," I mumbled. Fucking sleeping pill. I had to stop taking them. They fucked me up for the next day, and then I was asking Lola for one of those herbal things. Herbal, my ass. Speed, more like it. Just what Nick needed, a drug addict girlfriend, after what happened with AJ…

The last time James woke me up with that sentence, it was to tell me about AJ. I sat up, looking at him. Not Nick, no, no, not Nick.

He pointed at the TV, and the World Trade Center was on fire.

What? I must still be sleeping.

"Oh my god. What happened?"

"Terrorists. Two passenger planes, and they think there's another one at the Pentagon."

"Where's my phone? When did this happen?" I jumped out of bed, looking for my cell. I had to call Mom and Nick and, god, who else? Michael, James' ex, worked in one of those Towers! We used to meet him there all the time. Did drinks up at the restaurant on top to feel posh.

I looked over at James, and he shook his head. I could see the fear in his eyes. He was being calm, but… his voice was so calm it scared me. "About an hour ago. Less… I don't know. Your phone doesn't work, Rache. It's either the New York exchange or the cell, I'm not sure."

I whirled around and picked up the hotel phone, punching in my mom's number. Damn the hotel charges. "Why didn't you wake me up sooner?" I barked at him, getting a busy signal and hanging up to dial again.

"I just woke up myself. Our adjoining door is unlocked, good thing. Lola's dead to the world, and you have got to stop taking those pills, girlfriend."

I stuck my tongue out at him, dialing for the third time. James placed his hand on the phone carefully, hanging up for me.

"Relax. I can't get through to my parents, either, I'm sure the phones are just down."

"And Michael?" There, I'd said it. James flinched, biting his bottom lip and looking back at the burning buildings.

"Michael's fine." I just stared at him, and he looked back over at me, "I'd know, Rache. I just… would. Right?"

He was looking at me for validation now. Oh, hell. If it were Nick or Jeremy, hell, even Damon, if they were in that burning building, I'd like to think that I'd have some feeling that they were okay. Or… not. I sat back down on the bed and ran my hand down his arm, trying to be comforting. "Yeah, James. You'd know. Michael's fine. He's probably running around to all the offices helping people get out."

I knew with Dad. I didn't know what it was, but I couldn't sleep that night, I was so sad and unsettled.

James smiled, a real, genuine smile that reached his eyes and laughed, "He's such a Boy Scout, my Michael."

My Michael. He hadn't said that in a really long time. There'd been a period when I didn't think James was ever going to get over breaking up with him. That'd been so horrible, and then I'd fucked off to London and let him down, too. Just thinking about it made me want to cry. I pulled James to me, and I could feel him shaking as he held me tighter.

"He's going to be fine, sweetie. I know he is. I'm so sorry, James."

He just nodded. He didn't have to ask why, he knew. We were quiet for a moment, "Rache, where's Nick?"

"Toronto."

"Good, they're saying those planes that crashed were Boston to LA."

I just blinked at him for a minute. "They left Boston last night and drove all night." Then it hit me, "Fuck, James, I think Leighanne was leaving this morning for L.A." Right? Didn't he say that? He and AJ and Howie were on the road, but Kevin and Brian had stayed behind. Brian wanted to see Leighanne off this morning before heading for Toronto?

"Call the blond wonder, then."

I dialed his number, and he answered before it rang once. "Rache?" He sounded panicked. I'd never heard that tone in his voice.

"Yeah, baby. I just woke up. Tell me Leighanne wasn't on one of those planes!"

He was quiet for a moment, and I sank onto the bed. Oh, god, Brian… "Oh, Nick, no…"

"No!" he half-yelled. "She's fine. They overslept. She and Brian and Kevin are on their way here."

I took a deep breath. "Don't scare me like that!"

"Sorry, baby. I was just so glad to hear your voice…" His voice trailed off, and I could feel his panic. "Danny was leaving for L.A. this morning," he told me quietly, and I had to think quick. One of their crew, the guy who worked Nick's little toaster thingie that popped him up on the stage. Right?

"Shit," I whispered, and he sighed.

"Maybe he's okay. We don't know for sure." We were quiet for a moment. "Your mom called me."

She what? Oh, man. "Did that freak you out?"

I could just see him nodding. "A little. But your cell isn't working, and the hotel wouldn't put her through. What name are you staying under?"

"Patsy Kensit."

"That's a new one…" he teased.

"We're being Oasis," I explained. "British press, we want it to get back to Damon."

I didn't even care that she was talking about Damon. I'd talk to her about anything; I was just relieved to hear her voice. "I love you," I blurted out, and I saw Howie smile at me from across the room. I got up, going into the bedroom and falling on the bed. I didn't want to look at the TV anymore; I just wanted to hear Rachel's voice. She was fine. I knew she was safe.

"I love you, too, bunny." I could just see her smiling. Sitting up in bed with James, probably picking at her breakfast as she talked to me, cursing the fact that there were no good bagels in Chicago.

Or would she be doing that? I had this ominous feeling like everything in my life had suddenly changed. Irrevocably.

"So she called you? So they can call out?"

"Yeah. I guess. I gave her Nick Zephyr, though. So you should probably see if the front desk can change it or something."

"Good idea, bunny. Yeah." She was quiet for a minute, and I could hear some commotion in the background. "Darien and Jeremy just came in," she sighed. "Are you with the fellas?"

"Yeah. Well, Brian and Kevin are in their buses. Frank thinks they'll probably get hung up at the border."

"Yeah…" she agreed, then it got quieter. "Michael's in there, Nicky."

Michael? Another ex-boyfriend I didn't know about? No. She probably knew lots of people who worked there. She lived in New York, after all.

"Who's Michael?" I hoped I didn't sound as jealous as I felt. I was such a child sometimes.

"James' ex-boyfriend. Michael. He's an accountant and worked in the North Tower. We used to go there all the time to see him, eat at the restaurant… oh, god. I don't know what James will do, Nick."

Michael. Right. James told me all about him one night, how he made James choose between him and the band and James chose the band. Even I could see how much that hurt him, still.

"And Mari!" she gasped. "A girl Darien used to date. She worked at one of the bars in the lobby. They were just together, when we were in New York... And… god, Nick. So many people I know."

"Aaron's there," I had to tell her, and she gasped again.

"Did you talk to him? Is he okay?"

"Yeah," I sighed, and told her almost the whole story before she screamed. I heard Sarah scream, too, and I jumped off the bed, running into the living room to look at the TV again.

One of the Towers was falling.

How could the World Trade Center fall down? How was that possible?

"Which one is it?" Rachel yelled, and I heard Jeremy answer her. His voice was close to the phone, like maybe he was holding her, but I didn't care. I was glad there was someone there to do it.

"It's the South. The last one hit."

"Not the North, okay," she sighed. Which one was Michael in? But then her voice changed again. "Nicky, I have to go. I think James is going to pass out. I love you."

"I love you, too, buttercup," I told her, hoping she'd hear me before she hung up.

"Mom's gonna call you," she told me. "She won't be able to get me, so she'll try you again. Tell her it's Patsy Kensit, and tell her to get James' parents and tell them to call here. He's gonna want to talk to them. Love you," she said again, and the phone went dead.

I didn't want to be the responsible one. I was bad at it. I rejoined the group in the living room, sitting on the floor next to Howie's chair, and he reached out, grabbing my shoulder as we watched the Tower collapse again as the station replayed the footage.

"Do you think they know?" James asked, pleading, his voice hoarse. He was on the floor in front of the TV. He always did that when something excited him. He couldn't watch it from across the room on the couch, no, he had to be right in front of it. It was a habit that used to drive me insane, because he was so damn tall I'd have to join him or miss everything.

But right now it was fine. We were all in the living room of the suite Lola and I were sharing. We were supposed to be doing interviews here in about an hour, but I knew that wasn't going to be happening. I was sitting next to James, stroking his hair, but he didn't take his eyes from the television, staring at it like he'd see Michael emerge from the North Tower unscathed, in the middle of all the rubble.

"Does who know what?"

"The people still in the North Tower. Do they know the South Tower collapsed? Do they know a plane hit the top of the building? They're so big, I bet they don't really know what's happening."

I exchanged a glance with Jeremy. "I don't know, baby."

"You know Michael. He'll take care of everyone else before himself. He's on the sixty-first floor of the North Tower, and I bet he's still there."

"He's a smart dude," Darien offered. "He's getting the hell out of there."

James just shook his head. "No. I have to tell him."

"James," I said carefully. He was starting to scare me.

"Get me a phone!" he barked, and we all jumped. Lola handed him her cell phone.

"None of yours work. Do you know the number? Should I look something up online?"

"I fucking know the number!" he snarled. He grabbed the phone from her, looking away from the television for only a second to dial. It wasn't even helpful. It was the Today show in the studio, because all the live cameras had moved from the cloud of debris that settled over the city as the Tower fell.

Maybe only the one Tower would fall. Michael's Tower was hit first, they had more time to get out. He'd get all his colleagues out, and he'd go with them, and right now, he was safe somewhere. Maybe he had time to get into that little deli that had the best pickles in Manhattan, the one around the corner. Yeah, that's where he was, safe from the falling rubble, sipping coffee and eating a decent bagel.

"Voicemail! Fuck!" James screamed, throwing the phone across the room.

"That's good, sweetie," I said, trying to sound calm. "That means he's not at his desk."

"Or their phones are already destroyed!" He turned to look at me, an expression of such panic on his face that it brought tears to my eyes. I put my hands on his shoulders, trying to steady him.

"James, darling, you can't save him. It's horrible, but you can't change anything now."

He looked at me for a long moment, then gathered me into his arms, holding me so tightly I almost couldn't breathe. "You're okay," he whispered. "I've still got you."

"And Darien and Jeremy and Lola, we're all here," I told him quietly, rubbing his back, trying to soothe him at least a little bit. "And I know your family is fine, Nick told me that my mom called him. So they're okay out there, and we'll talk to them soon."

He rocked me back and forth, not letting me go. "I don't know how…"

"Shh," I soothed him. "Don't panic. We don't know anything yet. Maybe he called in sick today. Maybe he's on vacation. Maybe he's already safe."

"He's not safe. That's…" He let go of me, looking at me with an almost amazed expression on his face. "That's it. He's scared to death, he's fucking terrified, and I can feel it."

I didn't doubt him for a second. He probably hadn't spoken to Michael in months, but I believed him. They'd been together for years, and they still loved each other. They always would. They kept in touch a little. I knew there were sometimes emails and phone calls.

"So can I be hopeful about Mari?" Darien asked, only half joking, and I smiled over at him.

"You only dated her for a couple of months, babe," I told him, and he sank back into his chair, biting his nails again.

"Damnit," he muttered, staring at the TV again. This was no time for jokes, even with Darien. We were quiet for a while, just watching the TV, and we jumped when a phone rang. It was Lola's, still in the corner where James had thrown it, and she didn't move to pick it up.

Lola always answered her phone. Always. Jeremy and I exchanged a look, and he leaned over to pick it up. "Lola?" he asked, quietly, holding it out to her.

"I think my brother, Chris, might be in there. He had some new temp job when I talked to him last week, and it was in the Towers. I don't know which one. That's my mom."

Oh, Lola. No wonder she looked so shocked. I thought she just looked the way I felt, but it was more than that. Jeremy looked at me again, then answered her phone. "Lola's phone… yes, ma'am, she's here. This is Jeremy Nolan." He could be so polite sometimes, my Jeremy. He was good in a crisis. "Yes, ma'am, she's been watching. We all have."

He held out the phone to Lola, smiling at her. "She's nice. And she sounds calm."

"Mommy?" Lola said, and I would have smiled, if I wasn't so scared. Lola was not the type of woman to call her mom 'Mommy.' That was me. I glanced over at the room phone, willing it to ring. I'd feel better if I could talk to Mom. Nick had said she was fine, but I needed to hear her voice. "No, I haven't heard from him."

Jeremy and Darien got up at once, sitting on the couch on each side of her. I would have gone, too, but James had my hand in a death grip, and he was sitting there with his eyes closed, somewhere else entirely.

"I don't know either," Lola said helplessly. "He just told me the Towers, not which one. I think he said the view was only like 30 stories up, that's got to be good, right?"

The room phone rang and Darien grabbed it. "Sudden Silence Central," he said, then laughed. "Kate!"

I exhaled for the first time all day. Darien said something to my mom, then tried to bring the phone over to me, but the cord wouldn't reach. I tried to get up, but James wouldn't let me. I leaned closer to him, whispering. "James, honey, I have to go talk to my mom."

He nodded, but didn't let me go.

"Sweetie, I'll give you Darien. I'll talk to Mom for two minutes, then I'll be right back." He opened his eyes slowly, and he looked so scared I didn't know what to do.

"Here, man, hold on to me for a minute," Darien offered, sitting next to us on the floor. "Throw some of those scary psychic vibes over towards Mari for a minute, okay? And Lola's brother."

James leaned his head on Darien's shoulder, and Darien put his arm around him as I got up. I picked up the phone, looking at our miserable little bunch. "Mommy?"

"Oh, Rachel," she sighed. "Michael's in there, isn't he?"

Mom loved Michael. He and James had been to our place more times than I could count.

"Yeah," I admitted. "He's there. James is a total mess. He can tell that Michael's scared and not safe."

"I'm sure he can." Mom knew. She'd told me she knew the second Daddy died, woke up from a sound sleep and knew. "Who else? Lola's brother, did Darien say that?"

"She's on the phone with her mom now. And did you ever meet Mari? Darien dated her for a while. She came up a couple of times when we were recording the album."

"Long brown hair? I remember her. Oh, that's right, they met at that bar in the Towers you all used to go to." They'd met when James and Michael were still together, and had been off and on ever since. One of those casual things. Darien never got too attached to a girl. But Mari used to give us updates on how often Michael came into her bar for a drink after work, and whether he was with anyone. God, Darien had just been with her when we were in New York.

Darien was our rock. He was the one that made us all laugh, and now he was sitting there with his arms around James, staring at the TV intently. I'd never seen him look so serious. James had told me he'd been great during Dad's funeral, but that was such a blur to me… I just remember having James on one side and Darien on the other that whole long day. This day might be longer. This day it wasn't just me, it was the whole country.

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