Chapter 19 - page 10

Oreos for Breakfast - Chapter 19

By
The Paperbag Princess & The Pumpkin Coach

I stared at my bag and tried not to pout. Fuck. I hadn't brought anything but jeans and shorts… what the hell was I going to wear to dinner? Somehow I think my new silky lingerie wouldn't go over well in the hotel restaurant, no matter how nice the hotel was. I heard Nick moving around in the living room and glanced over at the clock. 6:30… I could just feel the minutes ticking away. I had to be on an midnight flight… five hours, and even though I was booked first class, I probably still needed to be there early with the new airline restrictions.

I took a deep breath, pulled on my jeans and found a silky top at the bottom of my bag. I had the amazing earrings and necklace that Nick had given me when the video hit number 2 and 1 on TRL earlier this summer. That'd dress it up, right?

"Rache?" Nick's voice came through the door and I jumped.

"Just a sec, bunny. I'm almost done."

"I'm hungry!" he whined and I had to laugh. Ducking into the bathroom, I twisted my hair up in a sloppy bun and threw on some lip gloss. That'd have to do.

I found him in the living room, sitting on the couch and flipping through the channels. He jumped up, running over to me, "Wow. You are so amazing, Rache."

"The lack of food is going to your head, darling." He laughed and leaned over to grab something from the couch, then presented me with a huge bunch of flowers. "Nick! Where'd these come from?"

He shrugged, "It's a nice hotel, Rache. They have these things. And we're not coming back to this room, either."

I eyed him suspiciously, and he smiled. "I called down, and the penthouse is free." He pulled me into his arms and kissed me, nuzzling my neck when I pulled away, "There's a huge marble tub for two and a big king size bed."

"But I have to leave in a few hours, bunny."

"So, we'll eat fast, Rache. I just… wanted to make it a little special. Early birthday present."

Again, I felt my heart stop as I looked up into his bright blue eyes. He loved me so much - how could I have doubted that for a moment? He always thought he was bad at presents, but he wasn't. He always did the sweetest things for me. Hell, I would have been impressed with just the flowers.

"Then we better eat quick…"

We decided to pack after dinner and headed down the hall to the elevator. "Shit, I should get my phone," I remembered, and he shook his head.

"No phones!"

I sighed, going back to the room. "No, I promised I'd have it on. Two seconds, bunny."

When I stepped back into the hallway, I heard AJ's voice. Were the boys still here? I thought only Nick was staying and everyone else had gone on to Chicago.

"Nicky! Heard about your night last night. Dawg, you must be seriously hurting. Rumor is you were something else…"

AJ stopped talking as I rounded the corner, his eyes wide as he looked at me and then back to Nick.

"RACHEL! Dude, you didn't tell me that Rachel was here!" He ran over to me, pulling me into a bear hug and lifting me off the ground.

"Hey! Put her down, dawg! Mine!" Nick protested as I hugged AJ and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"To what do we owe this amazing honor? You were just with us a couple days ago!"

I shook my head and wiggled out of his arms, "Just a spot check. Have to make sure my man's being true to his word." I looked past him to Sarah and waved, "You should join us for dinner."

Nick groaned loudly, pulling me into the elevator, "No! Love you, Aje, but she's mine for a whole five more hours!"

But AJ ignored him, following us into the elevator. "You never want to share the women anymore, Nick… it's so unfair!"

I wrapped an arm around Nick's waist, and he smiled down at me, "No sharing! And I better not hear of you even thinking about it, little man!" Nick laughed and leaned down to kiss me quickly. "Speaking of which, what's this about you kissing other girls?"

I gave him a stern look, and he froze, his eyes briefly darting over to AJ and then back at me, "Whatcha' talking about, baby?"

"Oh, don't act all dumb just because I'm here! James has made it a habit to read your boards to find incriminating Backstreet stories to tease me with. The freak!" He had the "deer caught in the headlights" look again and I tried not to laugh. It was way too much fun to tease him and watch him panic.

"Rachel, you know half that shit is false. More than half!"

"Most of it! Those girls are crazy," AJ offered.

"Alex! That's your adoring public. Wait until I get back to the room and post that you think they're all crazy! See how many presents you get tomorrow!"

I looked up at Nick. Why was he still panicking? Couldn't he tell I was joking? "Buffalo, Nick!" I finally said, but he stared at me blankly.

"Buffalo!" Sarah cried. "I remember! That girl on the side the stage just about died when you kissed her, Nicky!"

"It was just a few days ago!" I hit Nick on the chest, "How much did you drink this week, little man? Did you even remember who I was this morning?"

"Of course I remember, Rache. Buffalo. The girl I kissed in Buffalo, during my intro! Duh!"

He led me off of the elevator and shooed AJ and Sarah away as they followed us to the restaurant.

"Dude! We have to eat, too." AJ laughed, "Okay… Okay… I get it. The death glare means you want alone time with your girl!"

Nick rolled his eyes and grabbed my hand in his, pulling me along as the hostess led us through the restaurant to a private room in the back. There were curtains enclosing the table and candles lit all around.

"Nick, this is so nice."

He beamed over at me, pulling out my chair as I sat down, "I know how to treat my girl right, Rache." He took the chair next to me and poured us both wine. "Sorry, I couldn't get Connor wine on such short notice," he apologized.

"I need to make sure you have a case at all times, then."

Before I knew it, our food appeared and I giggled at him. "With all this food, Nick, you are eating fries and a burger?"

He rolled his eyes at me, "I like burgers."

"You are so unadventurous!" I teased, and he raised en eyebrow, bending down so his lips were next to my ear.

"I didn't hear you complaining about that this afternoon," he whispered, and then he bit playfully on my earlobe, making me shudder.

"Stop it!" I hissed. "You are not a very adventurous eater!" I corrected myself, and again he raised an eyebrow at me, making me turn about 10 shades of red. "Fuck it! Eat whatever you want."

"You sure about that? With all these people just two feet away? These curtains can't keep the sound out, can they? And you are loud…" He teased, and we both started giggling. I picked up a French fry and stuffed it in his mouth.

"Stop it!" Sometimes being with him was like being in love with an eight-year-old!

"Oh, AJ and Brian are over there… why don't we got say hello and have a drink or something?" she asked as we made our way out of the restaurant.

I stopped and looked at her, "What do you mean?" I didn't want to hang with anyone but her. I wanted to count down the hours to her plane by making love to her as many times as possible in our new room. We might even have time to use that big marble tub. She could wash my hair. I loved it when she did that.

"You know, be social with your band mates? I've never spent that much time with Leighanne."

"You hate Leighanne," I countered.

"I don't really know her, and Brian's like one of your closest friends. Shouldn't I know her a little?"

Should she? Brian and I weren't really that close anymore… I pouted at her, but she ignored me. "I see them all the time, Rache. And you're here!" I snuggled up against her back, nuzzling her neck as we waited for the elevator.

She turned and kissed me quickly, putting her arms around my waist and pulling me close to her, "I know, baby, but we never hang with the guys. Just a quick drink… say hi at least? I feel like they don't know me. I certainly don't know them very well. Well, apart from AJ. You know, he was my boyfriend!"

I groaned. Rachel was mine, damnit! I didn't like sharing her, even if it was just with AJ. She hugged me again, grinning up at me, "You are so cute when you're all jealous like that!"

Cute? She'd think I was gorgeous if she could have seen me this week when Jeremy answered her phone. Again, the guilt from what I'd done last night surrounded me, but quickly it was replaced with that empty feeling that I got when she wasn't standing in front of me and I listened to her phone ring and ring, then her voicemail clicking on. I hated that feeling, knowing she was off having fun when I needed to talk to her.

The elevator doors opened, and Frank was standing there. She squealed and jumped into his arms, and he nearly fell over. Not expecting her, were you? I smirked at him, and he rolled his eyes at me. I hadn't seen him since this morning, so I didn't know what ended up happening with Donna Debra Daria. But I knew he'd never say anything, not with Rachel around. He liked her too much. Me? He could care less about me, but Rachel? He loved her.

"Frank! I didn't think I'd see you!"

"What… how long have you been here, Rache?" He looked over at me as she pulled away from him, "And you know better than to be wandering around… there are still fans everywhere."

I shrugged. "Managed to go eat dinner without even a scream, Frank. We're fine. You can go upstairs."

"No! Frank should have a drink with us in the bar. Come on…" She took each of our hands, leading us over to the lobby bar.

"Love to, Rachel," he drawled, not even looking at me.

Thanks for the help, dude! Man, we had to work on those eye signals! That was clearly an "I don't want to stay here, I want to have hot sex with my girlfriend" look. He was slipping up today!

"Brian and Leighanne and AJ and Sarah are all in there. We can sit for 20 minutes, bunny," Rachel continued.

"Marble tub for two," I whispered in her ear, and her eyes fluttered shut.

"15?"

"10…" I grinned, and she pushed me into the bar.

"15, but I need to go check my flight really quick."

"It would suck if it was cancelled or something, buttercup."

She smiled up at me, taking her phone from my pocket and making me groan as her hand touched my thigh through my pants. "2 seconds. Order me another glass of wine. Merlot."

I rolled my eyes. Like I didn't know what kind of wine my girl drank! I pulled her back to me, cupping her face in my hands and pulling her up to me. Slowly, I kissed her, parting her lips and pushing my hips against hers so she could feel my growing erection. Come on, Rache, you know you want it. She whimpered softly, making me grin against her lips. I was so gonna win! Thor to the rescue!

She pulled away and took a deep breath. "15 minutes," she whispered. "Thor's not going anywhere."

Did Frank just laugh? Asshole! I started to protest again, but she clasped her hand over my mouth and then turned me around, "Go order my drink. I'll be back in a minute!"

I turned around, pout already in place, but she just laughed. "Go," she barked, and then disappeared into the lobby, finding somewhere quiet to make her call.

AJ and Brian were laughing as we joined them, "Nicky!" Brian greeted us, "Heard you hosted quite the party last night. Rachel cool with that?"

I glared at him, "We aren't talking about that. Not here. Not now. Not fucking ever. Too many shots. It's never happening again."

"Is that why she's here?" Brian questioned, lowering his voice so Sarah and Leighanne couldn't hear. Hell, I don't think they even noticed Frank and I had joined them.

"No. Well, maybe. I dunno. We talked this morning, and I was hung over. We fought."

"What about?" AJ interjected.

"What do we always fight about? That she's not here, I'm not there. Same old stupid shit." I rolled my eyes.

"Told you. Need a girl that can follow you around and be there when you get lonely, dude. Ain't never going to work otherwise."

Shut the fuck up, AJ! I wanted to hit him.

Brian shot him a stern look, "Way to be supportive, Alex!"

Was Brian sticking up for me? He hated Rachel! Well, he didn't hate Rachel, he hated me being with her. They all did. Maybe she was right; maybe they didn't know her very well. Whenever she was here, we did tend to stay in the room, too excited about having a few precious hours together to share them with anyone else.

"I'm just sayin', it's hard when you've got a girl who can't be around. Too many temptations, right, Nicky?"

"Stop it! We're gonna be fine. Just fine. So I fucked up once. Hell, I was too drunk, I doubt anything happened anyway."

"Was she there this morning, dude?"

I glared at AJ, "Yeah… but..... Look, I'm not having this conversation with you guys! We're fine. She'll never know and we'll be fine. One slip up. We all have them, right?"

I looked pointedly at AJ and he took a sip of his club soda or whatever he was drinking and shrugged his shoulders, "Don't know what you're implying, dawg. I'm a saint!"

"Nicky…"

I turned around on my stool, and there she was. Fuck fuck fuck. Donna Debra Daria! What the hell was she still doing here? Didn't Frank get rid of her? I looked around for Frank, but he was down at the bar getting our drinks. I smiled weakly. I shouldn't piss her off, right? I'd be cordial and then tell her that she had to leave me alone. I didn't need a scene. Lord knows how many reports there'd be from last night to begin with. Where the hell was Rachel? Maybe I could get back upstairs.

"You made me leave so quickly this morning, I didn't get a chance to repay you for your… kindness… last night." She sighed, stepping in between my legs as I sat in front of her. She reached out for me, and I caught her hand.

"Umm… Look. Last night. I was a little drunk," I started.

She tried to pull her hand out of mine, but I held onto it firmly, "You weren't that drunk." She smiled at me and looked down at my crotch. Oh, fuck. Tell me we didn't actually have sex!

She looked sort of like Rachel. She was short and she had Rachel's hair. I'd been drunk enough that I'd convinced myself she was Rachel for a moment in the elevator. I remembered that.

"Well, I was really drunk. And I'm sorry…" I searched my memory for her name.

"Daphne," she said flatly, pulling away from me slightly.

"Of course, Daphne." I knew it started with a "D," I was close enough!

I practically floated through the lobby. Lola rocked so hard! She'd bought me another day with my boyfriend! Now we could put that big tub and bed to good use. Maybe I'd make him fuck me on the penthouse balcony. I grinned at the thought… I was so gonna buy her anything she wanted when I got to LA tomorrow night.

She'd moved around a meeting and booked me on a 10 AM flight tomorrow morning. It wasn't a lot of time, but I'd get to be with him all night. Maybe we'd even sleep!

I turned the corner to the bar and stood in the doorway, looking around for him. I noticed AJ and Sarah standing at the side of the bar, looking at some girl as she tried to grope her boyfriend. Dude, get a fuckin' room!

She moved her head, and I saw his face.

Fuck.

That was my boyfriend.

Nick?

I couldn't move as I watched them. He was holding onto her arm, and she giggled, bending down to whisper something in his ear. He caught me watching them as she moved away.

He looked too fucking guilty.

Was she the one in his bed this morning when I called? Her? He wasn't just hung over. He'd fucked a fucking groupie! I couldn't catch my breath, and I leaned back, the wall catching me before my legs gave way. He seemed to move in slow motion. I could see his mouth moving; he was saying my name, but I couldn't hear him. I knew that look in his eyes. It was Jeremy's look. It was Damon's look. Fuck me. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears, drowning everything else out. I felt a tear run down my cheek.

No, I would not fucking cry. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction.

I glanced over to the bar, and they were all staring at me, dumbfounded.

Did they all know? Was that why AJ was weird in the elevator when I was teasing Nick about kissing that girl in Buffalo?

Suddenly all the pieces seemed to fall into place. Of course, AJ had been teasing him about the girl he'd bagged last night. The old Nick was back, parties in his room and a different groupie in every city. He hadn't expected me this morning, after all. And he'd been so pissed at me yesterday. All that talk about jealousy this afternoon. Was he trying to get me to agree to an open relationship, prepare me for when I found out he couldn't be faithful? How stupid was I?

He was standing in front of me, reaching out for me, but I took a step back, turning around when I ran into Frank.

"Tell me he didn't fuck that woman, Frank."

I heard Nick call Frank's name from behind me, but Frank's eyes didn't move from mine. He didn't say a thing. Didn't blink. Didn't flinch. Just stared at me.

Now I felt like I was going to throw up. It was one thing to think it was true, but… I felt like someone had just punched me and I was gasping for air. I tried to take a deep breath, hoping to god my voice wasn't shaking, "I need to get my things. Don't let him near me."

Frank fished in his pocket and handed me our room key and then stepped away. I walked quickly to the elevator, and could hear Nick behind me. I pleaded for the elevators to come. I didn't want a scene captured for posterity by the few fans camped out in the lobby. I felt him behind me as the elevator doors opened, and I ran in, turning quickly and hitting the close button.

He caught my eye as the doors closed, and all I could do was shake my head as I heard him yell my name.

I pushed our floor and collapsed against the doors, tears spilling down my cheeks. Jesus fucking Christ, why had I let this happen? I did this! I knew better than to get mixed up with another fucking musician, and it'd happened again!

The doors opened, and I ran to the room… oh god, I hope he hadn't told the hotel staff to move us or anything. I just wanted to get my stuff and… and then what, Rache? I tried not to think, letting myself in and then flipping the deadbolt and chaining the door. I knew Frank wouldn't be able to keep him downstairs. But at least I could keep him out until I composed myself and packed my bag.

I stood there and looked around the room. No one had touched it. It was like a time capsule of my life before it blew up. The flowers Nick had given me before we went to dinner were still on the table and his discarded hotel robe and my new sexy silk one were lying next to the chair. I bent down and picked up his robe, holding it to my face. It smelled like him. Quickly I used it to brush away my tears before throwing it back down on the floor.

I couldn't do this. I had to keep myself together at least until I got out of this hotel.

Then what?

Maybe I was still booked on the flight tonight? I'd have to call Lola and figure it out. Then call James. Oh god, they'd all know. They were already mad that I'd caved and come to see him and now… the humiliation was almost more than I could bear. I could see Jeremy's smug expression. He wouldn't actually say "told you so," but he'd have a lot of fun implying it.

There was a pounding on the door, "RACHEL!" Nick screamed, his voice cracking. "Let me in, baby. I can explain."

No, you couldn't, Nick. You couldn't say anything that would make this better. You couldn't fuck me and make it all better or pull me in your arms and kiss this feeling away. All your fucking pop star charm was not going to make this mistake go away.

I grabbed my bag and just started throwing my clothes into it. I ran into the bathroom and pushed everything off the counter into it, too. I surveyed the room quickly. Car keys. I had a rental. I needed those.

He was still yelling through the door. "Rache, please let me explain. You don't understand. She… she didn't mean anything. I was just drunk and I missed you." I heard his body as he slumped against the door. "God, I missed you, Rache. You didn't answer your phone, and I needed to hear your voice. I needed you to tell me you loved me. And you weren't there. If you'd been here…"

I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled the door open, startling him, "What? If I'd been here… what? You wouldn't have fucked her?"

He just blinked at me. There were tears in his eyes, and he reached out for me. I stepped past him and into the hallway, feeling as if someone was ripping out my heart.

"She didn't mean anything, Rache. Please…"

"Neither did I, Nick. If you could lie to me and fuck her, then I obviously don't mean anything to you either."

"NO! I love you, Rache! I'm so sorry. You can't do this!"

I held up a hand and pushed the elevator call button again. "You sat there this afternoon and told me… told me that you'd been faithful. You said you'd been jealous sometimes, but you'd made a promise to me. I fucking told you that I'd felt like you were lying this morning, and you let me do that! You let me go on and then teased me about how silly I was. Jesus Christ, Nick! You can't fucking love me. You have no idea what those words mean!"

The elevator doors opened and I stepped in, turning around and expecting him to push his way in beside me. But he didn't move. He just stood there with a shocked expression on his face. Would this be the last time I'd see him? Part of me couldn't believe it. Was this how the song ended? In tears and angry words and then… nothing?

The doors closed, and that was it. Silence.

To be continued...

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