Oreos for Breakfast: Nick BSB Fiction

Oreos for Breakfast - Chapter 20

By
The Paperbag Princess & The Pumpkin Coach

"Whose bright idea was this?" James exclaimed as we went to commercial. "Do you always get this many gay callers on Lovelines?"

Dr. Drew looked over at James before leaning down to make a note about something on his clipboard. He was so good. I was in awe. I listened to Lovelines on the radio whenever I could, no matter who the special guest was, because I thought Dr. Drew was fucking cool. If I thought I could get him alone, I'd ask him why every man I fell in love with ended up cheating on me. I mean, we didn't do this for a living or anything, but he was great at cutting through all our joking and making a real point to the kids who called in.

All of whom, it seemed were gay or afraid they might be. In the last hour and a half, James had fielded just about every question you could bring yourself to ask about being gay or having gay sex.

I giggled to myself, hearing Darien in my mind, "Gay sex… dude, I thought James just liked ugly chicks." Yeah, oldest joke in the world, but Darien had to use it on the air. Freak.

Dr. Drew's voice pulled me back to the present, "No. Maybe one or two a show. Usually someone who's trying to come out and wants advice. Not usually this graphic, James."

Did James just blush?

"What, am I the only gay musician in the world?"

"Who will talk to us on air, yes." Adam joked, and we all laughed. I had to bite back a JC comment. Did Dr. Drew and Adam know? Did they know everyone's sex secrets? What a cool job that would be! Had N*Sync ever been on Lovelines? Better yet, had Backstreet ever been on?

I tried to imagine it and couldn't. AJ wouldn't have a problem… and maybe not Kevin. Howie? Nah, couldn't picture Howie sitting here and doing anything other than giggling. I knew from Catholic guilt. Good girls and boys didn't talk about s-e-x… and Brian. Oh no… Brian wouldn't approve of this, I'm sure. I mean, he never struck me as too strident, but Nick had said he was very religious. I just couldn't imagine him talking about how to make your fluid taste different by eating more sweet things. Umm… no.

And then there was Nick. Would Nick ever be on? I couldn't quite imagine it. Him and his buddies probably listened and laughed about it. He could be such a frat boy that way. Would he be listening if he knew I was on? Did he know?

Shit! Stop it, Rache. Every goddamned thing did not have to remind me of Nick.

I heard the producer in my headset, and I turned back to the microphone. Maybe we'd get a call I could actually answer this time, instead of handing it over to the gay poster boy.

"Welcome back to Lovelines on California's KROQ. We're joined tonight by one of the country's hottest rock/pop acts, Sudden Silence. Welcome back," Dr. Drew introduced us for the fiftieth time, and we said hi in unison, making Adam laugh.

"So I'm waiting for those calls for the Wanton Sex Goddess. I mean, America, here is your chance, Rachel Connor sitting right here - and she's lovely, I might add…"

"Awww, shucks. And I didn't even dress up for you, Adam! I heard you liked leather."

Adam made a growling noise, and I had to laugh. He was dressed like one of my brothers, khaki pants and a golf shirt. I just couldn't take him seriously like that.

"What man doesn't like leather, Rache?" Jeremy leered, and I rolled my eyes.

"Had your shot, Nolan," Adam interjected. "My turn! Move over… let me get in here by Rachel… ahhh… better." Of course, he hadn't really moved, and I tried not to giggle too much. He made a loud sniffing noise, "You smell so good, too. Do you wear perfume?"

"No. Too girly." I tried to affect a sexy voice, but I'm sure it was just laughable. It was hard to be sexy on cue! Much easier when I had my guitar to hide behind. "I'm not a girly girl, Adam, or hadn't you guessed?"

"Oh, I guessed… anyway, America. If we have any questions for the STRAIGHT members of Sudden Silence… bring them on!"

"But it's been great having James here. So rare that we get the pop star who's gay and out of the closet," Dr. Drew joined in, and again I had to bite back a comment. Damn, this was hard.

"Well, what's the fun of being in the closet?" James leaned forward, taking another sip of his tea. James never talked this much in interviews… was he losing his voice? "Then you're forced to have sub-standard sex with closeted accountants or something."

Everyone laughed, and James winked at me. Oh, that must be a JC reference! Was JC listening? That could be fun. Maybe he could call in and disguise his voice…

We were onto the next caller, though. Dr. Drew introduced her as a woman who was worried about her sexual fantasy.

"Fantasies are nothing to worry about," Jeremy offered. "As long as they don't hurt anyone, that is. You gotta do those role plays safely, boys and girls."

He leered at me again. Oh, hell… why did I even come tonight? It was all innuendo and pick on Rachel for him. Was he trying to piss me off? I shifted in my seat. My ass still hurt from last night. Hey! That was an example of a role-play that didn't play out well. Okay, not sharing that little anecdote.

The woman laughed with Jeremy and then launched into her story. She and her husband were going to do a three-way, but she was feeling guilty. She'd talked him into it, but now she was afraid he was too into it.

I stole a glance at Jeremy, and his eyebrow shot up. Shit. I looked down at my hands. Last thing I needed was Jeremy divulging our sex life here. At the end… well, it had been pretty fucked up, no fantasy off limits. We'd done a few three-ways. I'd pick out the girls for him, he'd pick out the boys for me. Fuck, it was hot.

And here this woman was talking about how she wanted to do this with her husband. Do you do that sort of thing with your husband? The person you're supposedly in love with? That wasn't love. It was just sex. I found that out the hard way.

I glanced over at Dr. Drew, and he was frowning over at me. Okay, we knew Dr. Drew's answer. I couldn't even look at James. He knew too fucking much, and he hadn't approved when Jeremy and I were delving into that stuff. Said that if we were in love, having sex with anyone else was cheating… didn't matter if I was in the room or not.

Well, in the end, that's sort of what it felt like.

I heard myself telling the woman that. Shit!

"I know you might think you want it. But I… I can't imagine. This is your husband, right?"

"Yes. And I do love him. We have a small daughter, and he's so good with her."

"Then why do you want to jeopardize that?" I asked.

"I'm not! It's a fantasy… he says it will make the sex hot."

"No doubt!" Jeremy laughed. "Threesomes are fucking hot! I had a girl once who was so into them. Picked out the girls for me to be with and loved to join in…"

His voice trailed off, and I wanted to smack him. How dare he! Okay, he hadn't said my name, but I'd all but admitted to doing it before, and now he was, too. It didn't take a fucking brain surgeon to connect the dots!

Suddenly everyone was talking at once - James trying to deflect Jeremy's comment and Dr. Drew asking her again just whose idea it really was. Of course it wasn't hers. It never was. Finally she admitted it was his and he wanted to be with another man, at that.

"Oh, your husband's really gay!" James offered, and I think the woman about died.

"It's okay if you want to experiment," I talked louder so I could be heard over their voices. "But how would you feel if your husband told you that he'd been bored one afternoon while you were at work and met this other person at the park… thought he was cute. I mean, you didn't object before, so why would you now?"

"That's cheating!" she declared.

"And this isn't? Because you're in the room? Trust me. I speak from experience here, you'll regret it."

"Experience?" Adam added, trying to joke us out of the heavy conversation.

"Ummm… yeah. But don't get any ideas..." I stopped as Dr. Drew went to wrap up the call.

I couldn't decide who I liked better. The blonde? Or the redhead? The blonde was more aggressive, sitting next to me with her hand on my knee, fondling the stem of her wineglass while we talked. But the redhead….oh, she could barely keep those breasts in her skimpy top, and I liked the way she slowly smiled at me.

Vinnie was talking up the redhead, but I got to pick first. That was the game. The girls came to us because of me, only fair that I got first pick, right? Maybe I'd pick the redhead just to piss him off.

"Why don't we go upstairs?" he asked, looking over at me. Good plan. I'd decide upstairs. I stood up, leading the way to the elevator, until Frank got in front of me, hitting the button to call it.

I didn't even look at him as the redhead, I think, came up behind me, pressing her breasts against my back. Heh. Maybe she was picking me before I got a chance to decide. Vinnie might be good looking, but I was the pop star.

On the elevator, the blonde leaned over to whisper to me. "Is he coming too?" she wondered, looking at Frank.

I laughed. "No. He is definitely not invited."

Even standing behind him, I could see him roll his eyes. Bastard. Why was he even here? I didn't need him looking at me, all disapproving and shit. He'd found Vinnie and me earlier in the bathroom at the venue and about glared a hole in my fucking head. I didn't need his approval for shit. Wasn't this one of the perks of my stupid fucking job? Groupies and drugs on demand?

Frank led us off the elevator, handed me my room key, and left. "Six a.m. Long drive tomorrow."

"Whatever," I mumbled as the door to his room closed. Fucking asshole. I needed new security. Who did I talk to about that? Frank was in charge of the bodyguards. I couldn't go to his boss to complain about him.

I would worry about that later. Vinnie headed for his room, and I followed. Good plan. We'd been hanging out in my room all day. It was a fucking disaster area now.

We were barely in the room before the blonde was kissing me. But what if I wanted the redhead? She was fucking up the game now. This was my game. Everyone had to play by my rules. "I hear you like to watch, Nick."

I looked down at her as she licked her lips. "Watch what?"

Her hand moved towards the waistband of my shorts. "Girls. Together. We're good at that."

Oh. Really? Maybe I didn't need to choose. Suddenly the game didn't seem so important. I liked this change. Vinnie caught my eye as the redhead pulled her shirt over her head. Yeah, he liked it, too.

Or maybe he hadn't heard my girl and he just liked his girl's breasts. Whatever. Same thing. I did like to watch; how did they find out these things? Tell one person one thing one time, and it's on web pages everywhere.

Maybe that was a good thing. My girl started unbuttoning her shirt, her eyes never leaving mine. "What about your friend? Does he like to watch, too?"

I couldn't take my eyes off of her as she exposed her skin to my gaze. "Hey, Vin! Do you like to watch?" I yelled out.

"Porn flicks do not lie, Nicky. Who doesn't?"

We glanced up at each other, and it was all I could do not to crack up. How great was my life? Two girls willing to do whatever I wanted. Why shouldn't I share the wealth with my best friend?

The girls turned to each other and kissed, and my knees almost gave out. Fuck, that was hot. They were really into it, too, rubbing against each other like they couldn't get enough, their breasts touching as their lips met. Fuck. I was the luckiest guy in the world.

They broke apart, and the blonde smiled at me. Maybe I should have figured out her name, huh? "Hope the bed is big enough for all four of us."

"Trust me, Sierra, we will make room," Vinnie assured. He'd gotten her name. Thank god. Did the redhead have a name? Hell, had she said a word yet?

She bent her head, kissing Sierra's breast, and I didn't give a shit what her name was. More of that, please. Sierra obviously agreed, shutting her eyes and moaning lightly. "Oh, Jasmine, that is so good…"

Jasmine and Sierra. I could remember that, right? Jasmine was a fairy princess, after all… stop thinking about that, Nick. That was Rachel's thing, the fairy princesses. Now they're just groupies, just like they always were. Jasmine was the redhead, Sierra the blonde. It was always good to cry out the right name. And it looked like I might be doing a lot of that.

Vinnie, always the gentleman, put an arm around the girls and led them over to the bed. They collapsed against it in a pile of long, luscious limbs, and Vinnie settled on one corner, watching avidly as they wiggled around. I sat down as Jasmine lay back, letting Sierra suck her nipples. "Mmm, so good, Sierra… Much better than Rachel, yes."

Who? Couldn't… no, this was probably some lesbian thing I didn't need to know about. Did it have to be that name? It wasn't even a fairy princess name! Well… it was my fairy princess…

Was. Not anymore.

Jasmine opened her eyes and smiled when she saw my face. "I was disappointed when I realized Rachel wasn't with you. Tell her I say hi."

"What?" I whispered, making her giggle. She ran her hands through Sierra's hair, sighing in pleasure as Sierra moved her head, kissing down her stomach.

"She and Jeremy and I had a lot of fun together. He likes to watch, too."

Jeremy and…? Rachel and this girl…? No. No. No.

Not my Rachel. Weird coincidence, there was another Rachel and another Jeremy and…

"I'm surprised she's not with you, actually. She doesn't like to share, unless she's in the room."

Jasmine needed to stop talking. Or maybe I needed to stop listening.

"She's history," Vinnie offered. "I'm sure Sierra is much better."

"Mm, yes," Jasmine agreed, as her friend started tugging her skirt over her hips. "Much. Don't you think so, Nicky?"

"I…"

I wanted to agree. I wanted to go back five minutes, to when this was one of the hottest things I'd ever seen. But now all I could see was Rachel's face. Her lips on this girl's body. Jeremy watching.

Did she really?

Even if she didn't, I was useless now. I'd started thinking, and this was definitely not about thinking.

"Sorry," I mumbled, getting up from the bed and making my way to the door.

"Dude!" Vinnie yelled, and he caught me before I could get out. "What the fuck are you doing?"

This was all his fault. If I hadn't taken his stupid advice and tried to make Rachel jealous, she would still be mine. "Enjoy, man. They're all yours." The door slammed behind me before I could hear what he had to say.

He didn't come after me. Why would he? He was only here because I got him laid. Bastard. Anna was right about him; he was only my friend because I had money. It was all about what I could do for him. The hotel rooms and the first class flights and the girls and the drugs and the booze.

I should go back in there and kick him out. They were putting on that show for me, not him.

Did Rachel put on a show for Jeremy?

I barely made it into my room before I threw up. Fuck.

My head was spinning, and I leaned back against the cool tile. The last time I did this was the morning after I fucked that groupie and Rachel was on my phone. Shit. I felt so fucking guilty that morning, and look what she was doing!

Okay, had done. In the past, and probably years ago. But she never told me that. She told me how many guys she'd slept with… Well, not actual names. Did she say 'guys' or 'people'? Did girls not count? That would be pretty anti-feminist of her.

I was too fucking drunk for this.

Maybe it was all a lie. Maybe that girl was just trying to get me jealous, or get me hot, or freaked out, or something.

It fucking worked, didn't it? All of it. I was freaked out and fucking jealous that Jeremy got her to sleep with a girl. I couldn't even get her to call me back, and he got her into a threesome! Fuck, did she care about me at all? Was I just some game for her?

Without another thought, I found my phone. That bitch! I didn't mean anything to her, did I? She hadn't even fuckin' called. She walked out on me and never gave me the chance to even explain… voicemail, of course.

"Hi Rache, just need to tell you that Jasmine from Minneapolis says hi. Yeah. Remember her? The girl you fucked? What… do girls not count as cheating? How many threesomes did you have with Jeremy watching? Yeah. Just needed to pass on the message. Later."

I hung up the phone and threw it across the room. Fuck her! Even now that we aren't together, she's still fucking with my head!

What the fuck? I think that was Nick. Yeah. Drunk, but Nick. Jasmine? What…

Oh shit.

I fell in the nearest seat on the bus, and Jeremy grumbled as he tripped over my legs, "Watch it, Connor."

"Fuck off, J!"

Fucking Jeremy. I was gonna kill him later for that little stunt he pulled on Lovelines. Making eyes at me and then that last thing about the threesome… Wait! Did Nick listen? Was that why he was all pissed off at me? I looked down at my watch. 12:05AM. What time was it in… where was he? Minneapolis? I listed to the message from Nick again and glared at Jeremy.

"What?" he asked, opening a bottle of water and sitting across from me.

"Just… go away, okay?"

He stood up, eyes wide. "What the fuck ever, Diva Princess. What, did your friend come early this month?"

James glared at him and held onto my arm as I lunged for Jeremy. "Stop it, both of you! We'll be at the hotel soon, and you can go to your separate corners."

I rolled my eyes and shrugged James' hand off my arm. "Let me go. I'm not going to hurt him… even if he is being a fucking Neanderthal!"

Jeremy stuck his tongue out at me, and I sailed past him. No one was in the back. Fuck Nick for leaving that stupid message. Why the hell did he care who I slept with before I'd met him? It's not like I was the one being unfaithful at the drop of a bra. Picking up fairy princesses and Disney characters in hotel bars!

And I told him as much, yelling into his voicemail before James found me and pulled the phone out of my hands, clicking it off.

"Give that back!" I yelled, lunging for my phone.

James sat down beside me calmly and put my phone in his pocket. "No, you have lost phone privileges."

"What the fuck? It's my phone!"

"And my sanity! You are not playing this junior high game, Rachel! No! You aren't listening to your messages and calling him back every time he has a little crisis. Come on!"

I slumped in my seat, pouting up at James. "He's such an ass, James. I mean…."

James held up a hand to me. "No. Not yet. You haven't even been broken up for forty-eight hours. If you want to talk about it, fine. Let's talk."

I just stared at him. I didn't want to talk about it. I wanted to be angry and scream and find some way to hurt him the way he'd hurt me!

"Thought so… no phone. When we get back to the hotel we can order a midnight snack that's really bad for us and watch dirty movies on cable."

"I'm still not talking about it."

"Whatever, Rache."

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