Oreos for Breakfast: Chapter 30

Oreos For Breakfast: Chapter 30
By the Paperbag Princess and Pumpkin Coach

The red light flicked off on the camera and I let out an huge sigh, making Jeremy laugh at me.

"Babe, you didn't even have to suffer through the whole day!"

"Darien does a great impression of you, Rache," James offered as we quickly made our way off the set. I couldn't wait to get back to the hotel and my bed. Maybe Nick was done, too, and we could get Guntrum to bring us another basket of those amazing cookies and watch bad movies on cable all night. Would Roscoe's deliver chicken and waffles for a Grammy winner? Cookies and Roscoe's for dinner sounded… completely unhealthy. Hell, I was a Grammy winner now. I could do whatever I wanted, right?

Apparently not. Saffron was already waiting for us in our dressing room and I could feel the impending sense of doom. Or at least more work.

Sitting down in the makeup chair, I wiped off most of the gunk that they'd put on my face to make me look less tired and sick. Maybe if I looked as horrible as I felt, Saffron would take pity on me and not make me do whatever it was we were about to be asked to do. I let the boys talk around me, ignoring them as I told myself I couldn't get too exited about the prospect of cookies and Nick until we'd officially been dismissed.

What was this, grade school? Did I get a 30-minute recess if I finished my homework early?

Catching a glimpse of James in the mirror, I laughed. James and I used to do anything we could to get out of recess when we were in grade school, offering to help clean up the classroom or take notes down to the principal. Anything but be forced to play kickball with the other kids.

How the hell did I not know this man was gay growing up? It seemed so impossible now.

"What's cracking you up over there, Rachel?" James returned my smile in the mirror, and I just shrugged. Jeremy came over, handing me a glass of water and briefly massaging my shoulders. He'd been so nice to me today and part of me still didn't know quite how to deal with that. Being annoyed or angry with Jeremy was like second nature now, but dealing with the nice Jeremy still somehow caught me off guard. I felt part of me sliding back into those old habits. Bad habits.

My back stiffened and Jeremy stopped touching me, looking down and away from me as if he, too, was unsure what he should be doing. I know he cared for me. Just like I still cared for him. Back there in the interview room we'd had lots of questions about us. Not the band. But us… with a capital "U" - Jeremy and me. I never let myself think of that 'us.' Well, only long enough to laugh and dissuade Nick when he got jealous of something stupid.

Turning around, I touched Jeremy's arm as he moved away, "Thanks for… everything."

"No problem. Can't have you passing out again, can we? No time for anyone in this band to be sick."

"But I wanted a day off, too!" Darien whined, lightening the mood, as I realized that they were all watching us. Shit.

"It was half a day!" I whined at them as I drank half my water, noticing that my hand was shaking slightly. Maybe I needed another glass of juice or something. As is she could read my mind, Lola handed me a banana off the fruit basket on the table in the middle of the room. "Besides, I missed all the cool stuff!"

This morning, my band had been on the Today Show and Katie and Matt had surprised them with all sorts of presents, including a taped message from Duran Duran, congratulating us on our "first of many Grammys."

Lola promised she'd send me the tape so I could see it, too, but something told me that Mommy had probably taped it for me. I was pretty sure she was putting that new Tivo thing I got for Christmas from the record company to good use. She probably had "Sudden Silence" programmed in so it recorded every time we were mentioned. Could it do that? Should I put Backstreet in and see what it spit back out for me? That could be fun!

"Earth to Rachel! Are you still with us?"

Saffron was talking now and I'd totally missed it.

"Sorry. I'm still tired. I think I could sleep for a whole day. We all could." I wasn't the only one who'd been traipsing all over Europe getting no sleep and having to be nice and social when I didn't want to, after all.

"So, can we be done?" James asked, a hopeful look on his face. Right. We were in LA. JC was probably waiting for him somewhere. I should give him the tip about the cookies, but he was not invited to join Nick and me tonight.

"Almost" Saffron's voice told us we might not like what was coming next.

"But?" I asked, glancing down at my phone and paging through my two text messages from Nick. One had a picture of an apple and was reminding me to eat. The other one had a picture of a phone with the word - SOON! - spelled out underneath it. My boyfriend was such a dork.

Hey! Neither one said he loved me!

"You probably know this, Rachel. But I thought I should say something to all of you." We just stared at her. What did I know that they didn't? I couldn't think of anything. "We value all of our client relationships at the Firm and I think you know how much I have loved working with you…"

"You can't leave!" Darien shouted, jumping up and grabbing onto her like she was trying to get away from him.

"I'm not leaving, Darien." She laughed. "No worries about me." I glanced at Lola. If Saffron wasn't leaving, then was Lola? Not. That wouldn't make sense. I knew Lola loved working with us. My collapsing last night wasn't her fault. I was a grown woman and shouldn't have to be reminded to eat.

Lola shook her head at me and I looked back to Saffron. I was still too spacey to be following this conversation like I probably should. But I heard her say something about Backstreet and that grabbed my attention.

Did she just say that Backstreet had fired the Firm?

Shit! No wonder Nick wanted me to call him 'Soon!' What the…?

None of us had anything to say. Jeremy looked over at me and I shrugged my shoulders. "I've been here all day or sleeping. He hadn't mentioned anything to me."

He would have. Right? It had been so long since we'd had a decent conversation. Plenty of emails, but those were about recording and my tour, not about anything important. He loved Ken, his guy from the Firm. They hung out a lot.

I couldn't imagine that Nick wanted to leave Ken. Hadn't he just signed a solo deal with the Firm?

But she'd said that Backstreet had fired the Firm. Not Nick.

"Is Nick still with you?"

I had interrupted her, but Saffron stopped answering Darien's question and looked at me. "I believe so. I don't have all the details." Her look implied that I might have more details than she did, but I shook my head.

"I haven't seen him much since we've been here. I got a little… distracted."

She nodded, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket. "Speaking of which. Johnny Wright, 'Nsync's management, called me an hour or so ago. If you don't want to do the tour, he can pull someone else to do it."

Now everyone looked at me. Shit.

I would love to not do this tour. Two months off. It wouldn't kill us to be out of the public eye for two months, would it? It might be better for us. I could go home and sleep and be with Nick and figure out what was going on in his life. That sounded so much more important now.

But I couldn't do that to my boys. Especially since it had taken forever to convince Jeremy to do it at all. No, the exposure was great, and so was the money.

"I'm fine!" I insisted, trying to take a deep breath so my voice didn't shake. "I just need to take these couple of days and sleep."

"Do they just want us to fink out so that they can sue us for breach of contract?" Jeremy asked in his suspicious sort of way.

Saffron laughed. "I didn't mean the entire tour. I meant maybe a week." She waved her hand, and Lola gave her a binder. Opening it, Saffron found the tour schedule. "Johnny and I thought you could join them March 11, in Anaheim."

Eleven days. That sounded like heaven. Eleven days off. Almost two whole weeks.

"Do we have to give back any money?" Darien asked, and Saffron laughed.

"A little. And you won't get sales concessions from those days. But you still get the whole rest of the tour to make money."

"Yes," Darien said, and we all looked at him. "Seriously! I am so fucking tired. I haven't seen my Mom and sister since Christmas."

I loved Darien. I didn't have to be the first one to jump at the chance.

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