Oreos For
Breakfast: Chapter 34
By the Paperbag Princess and
Pumpkin Coach
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November 11, 2002 - Seatle, WA
Seattle sucks. It is always raining here.
Lousy TV, too. I need way more channels now. I'm watching Lizzie Maguire. I remember waking up with you on Saturday mornings and making fun of Aaron's girlfriend because she's a lousy actress. I used to love taking a shower and listening to you on the phone with him. You have the most adorable laugh with him. The two of you would talk all day if I let you, but I'd show up naked from the shower and you'd usually claim that room service was at the door.
You're so cute in the morning, your hair sticking straight up. I don't even mind your morning breath. Well, at least not first thing, when you're spooned up against me, kissing my shoulder and telling me how much you love waking up with me in the morning in that sleepy little voice.
Oh, Nick, I hate waking up without you. Every morning, I used to count how many more mornings I'd wake up without you. Nine or seven or two. Now I don't have that. I know when I'm going to se you again, but I don't know when I'm going to hear your sleepy voice in my ear and feel your long, naked body wrapped around mine and wake up knowing that you love me.
Maybe if I pick up more groupies I won't feel this lonely every morning. I haven't been doing that much. Well… except for those two guys in Baltimore. Yeah. Two. I couldn't decide.
I know you've been picking up a few groupies, if not two at once.
I must stop reading your boards!
Well, maybe on my boards today there will be reports of me at the bar flirting with the hottie from the front row. Or maybe he was just flirting with me, who knows? I certainly came back to my room alone. Have I lost all my flirting abilities? Was I so mopey last night that I turned him off? I'm not sure…
Hmm… it's a little blurry. The show was great, and we went for a drink at the bar, and this guy started talking to me… Josh. I drank more and we talked more and he told me how fabulous the show was and how great I was-
Why the fuck am I lying here alone writing to a ghost? I coulda had that guy. I know I could have. He was hot and he loved me.
Well, not love.Adored. Lusted is more like it.
Isn't that good enough, sometimes?
It's a fuck of a lot better than listening to the rain and watching Lizzie fucking Maguire.
I need to stop moping, don't I? The guys keep telling me that, but… I still keep doing it. Sometimes I'm okay, and this tour has been amazing, working with Gwen and Shirley, but…
I miss you.
And I need to get out of bed and shower and go do something with my friends.
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2001
Some content not suitable for children. You have been warned.