by The Paperbag Princess (c. 1997-98)

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: today its L.A...

tomorrow must be Ohio, right?

I am writing you from a plane high above the U.S. of A. I was going to stay in NYC for a couple of more days, but...

Well, I decided I'd rather go shoot Alanis in L.A. I wish I could shoot Alanis with something other than a camera, but she's on Madonna's label, and Madonna's on the list of people I'd most like to work with, so there ya go.

Anyway, off to L.A. I go. Alanis can most certainly afford to fly me first class and put me up in the Peninsula and I'll get to hang with John for a couple of days before stopping off to see my parents and friends in Cincy.

Taylor, that is. Sometimes I'm still amazed that he's my friend.

Hmm. We're over Texas. I've never been to Texas, I hear its an interesting place. Did you know the Childes are from Texas? This somehow explains bits of M's personality to me. The tendency to overdo things, among others.

It explains parts of Tony's personality to me, too. Different things, like his loyalty and knowledge of esoteric microbrewed beers. The little twang in his speech that shows up when he's drunk and tired.

The only bad thing about writing email on a plane is that I can't dial in to check for new messages. I could use some cheering up right now.

Can't get email, can't call anyone without paying an obscene amount of money when all I want to do is chat, too distracted to pay attention to the movie.

Not much to do but drink, but that's not a good idea. Would ramble on, but I'm afraid I've had too much to drink already and am not making sense.

I'll be ... back in London next week. I almost said 'home', but I'm not entirely sure what home is right now.

See you at the Groucho.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: tomorrow the world

Alanis, hmm? You're moving up in the world. Will the Mads be at the shoot? Will you get to touch the hem of her garment, you disciple of the 80s?

Hanging with John Taylor and Madonna, tsk tsk, isn't it just calamitous when one gets everything one wants? You know what our friend, Mr. Wilde used to say about tragedies, and one being not getting what you wanted...

Come now, Emmie, you're supposed to be the cheerful one. You're starting to sound disturbingly like Kate, claiming to be wretchedly miserable when you have the life little girls dream of.

I never could understand that about her. How she worked so hard to build the perfect life and perfect world for herself, and then carefully did everything within her power to dismantle it and make herself miserable.

But surely you're sick of hearing about my ridiculous love life by now.

So, I wonder how you know what Tony Childe sounds like when he's tired and drunk, hmmmmmm?

Especially considering that Kate Sutton was quite gleeful when she told me you had at least one date with the man.

Then again, you're running off to be with John now... Enquiring minds must enquire...

And home is what you make of it, Ems.

Alexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: do stop

talking around the subject, my dear sir.

Tony, yes.

John, no.

John a big no, actually, as I went to his house this afternoon when my flight got in and discovered that he's living with a woman.

::scratch head::

since you seem so interested in my love life, John and I have been flirting ever since we met, and now I find that he's living with this striking creature.

Just friends, they say.

uh-huh.

She's quite nice, this Salem. We all had dinner.

Shooting Alanis tomorrow. I love saying that. I can pretend its far more violent than it is. Don't think that 'the Mads' will grace us with her presence. Altho' I got the job because she saw my photos of Prodigy, and she really really really wants to sign them. She might mistakenly believe that I have some influence with them.

Like anyone can influence Liam Prodigy.

Speaking of Liams, any new word on Liam and Patsy? Spotted them at the Groucho? I can't decide if they're better together or apart. She's a twit, but he's calmer around her, most of the time.

As for Kate Charms, don't try to say that it was just her self-destructive streak that destroyed your relationship. You did an awful lot of that yourself.

I got quite the cold reception when I dropped off the tape for the Ice Cream video. Their manager wouldn't even see me, and I know she was there, I saw her in the conference room.

They reject this video, I blame you, Mr. James.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: Tony, yes?

Tony? Mon dieu! A Childe?! The way you and M used to hiss at each other like rival gangster molls?

No accounting, I suppose. Send him a cheery wave hullo from me.

John Taylor is living with a woman named Salem? Good grief. Isn't his sprog named Aberdeen or Anchorage or some such nonsense?

You are probably at the shooting range with Alanis now. She might not be a half bad looking bird if you could persuade her to wash her hair occasionally.

Ah, our beloved Gallagher Tag Team... God bless 'em! You've got to love them, really. I always found them immensely entertaining, actually. It's great theatre, like everything else they've ever done- unfortunately, I don't think they're actually bright enough to realise it.

Oops, sorry, forgot they were mates of yours... tee hee hee. Well, anyway, actually I saw Liam and Pats down the Grouch the other night. The good fellow lurched over and mumbled something, no doubt reprehensible, about your secondary sexual characteristics before Pats could drag him away by the ear. (Actually, I think it was something much closer to "Em, wot a fooking top bird, nice tits, and yew wiff yer kit 'angin' out an' awl" but I think it looses something in translation, don't you?)

Just when I thought it was safe to go back down the Grouch... I know you don't believe me when I say I've not been there in ages. And no, a certain Mr. Hirst has nothing to do with that, thank you very much. Ignore any stray rumours you may hear of a nasty scene between us the last time I was there...

But, as they say, it takes two to make a fight, and I'm really just a big sugar pussy under all this fringe, you know.

I know, I know, you don't have to lecture me about Kate and her self destructive streak. The problem with the two of us was that we were too much alike, really. And her self destructive streak tended to encourage my self destructive streak, which could only ever spell disaster. We had a bad habit of feeding each other's worst insecurities.

Alright, I'll admit it. We were bad together. I can admit that. Now, with a bit of distance from the whole thing. And I suppose a great deal of that badness was entirely my fault; I just couldn't see it at the time.

I miss her, you know. No, not like that, get your mind out of the gutter. I miss her friendship, more than anything else. Alright, so it was fun having such a sexually charged friendship, but once we took advantage of that sexuality, it destroyed the balance. Once we started fucking, we stopped talking, and that's where it all went wrong. I miss the way her mind works, I miss those fast and furious conversations, I miss having someone who knew everything I was going to say before I even said it, and laughed anyway. I wouldn't blame her if she never spoke to me again, but that's what hurts most of all.

I missed that about you, too, Emmie. I'm glad we're talking again, at least via email.

They won't reject the video. I don't think. I wasn't exactly her favourite person in the world the last time I saw her, and I suspect she blamed you as well. She thought that we had it off that night I was helping you move, did I ever tell you that? As if either of us had the energy after all those bloody boxes!

But I'd rather not remember that particularly ugly breakup scene right now, just when I've finally got myself to the point where I feel up to going out of the house again.

Therefore, I shall, with skill and conversational grace, deftly change the subject. Watch me deftly change the subject to...

Books! Books are always good. We both like books. At least you used to like books, or have cameras overtaken all your shelf space?

Alexxxxxxxx

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: Books are good

I still like books. Books are in my blood, my parents would disown me if I stopped reading.

Right now I am re-reading, for the millionth time, the Frances Hodgsdon Burnett books. You know, 'The Secret Garden' and 'A Little Princess'. Maybe you don't know, they're girl books. I started reading 'The Secret Garden' to Atlanta last night, and got sucked in, had to buy them on my way back from the shoot tonight.

Atlanta. John Taylor's daughter's name is Atlanta. Anchorage. As if.

The Alanis shoot was fine, speaking of weird 'a' names. No Mads. Lots of talk *about* Mads, lots of talk about how Mads loves my work, blah blah blah.

Jesus, 'Mads'. You've got me doing it now.

My life is weird, I spent all day with rock stars and record company wanks, and I'm staying in the one of the best hotels in the world... and here I sit, with my laptop and two books I first read when I was about 7.

I must be regressing in preparation for returning to Ohio tomorrow. Parents and Astrid and Tricia and my niece. All of these are good things.

Tricia and I bonded over these books when we were little, she'll be tickled that I'm reading them again. I'm afraid Emily is still a bit young to enjoy them.

Sorry, I'm rambling about these silly books. I've been in a strange sort of mood lately.

Which is to do with the fact that I can't say hello to Tony for you. Well, I *could*. I have his number, and I don't think he'd hang up if I called. But Tony and I are not together. We had a nice fling and that is about it.

I never once 'hissed' at M! She may have hissed at me on occassion, but I never returned the favor.

::pondering:: I probably would now. But I didn't then, too meek and convinced that she was far far more interesting than me.

Tony's really nothing like his sister, tho. Very different. He liked me, for one thing. ;->

Liam, on the other hand, hated me, so I'm surprised he noticed my tits. Or maybe that's all he noticed.

Kate thought we slept together? Did you convince her otherwise? If you mentioned the kiss, I'll back you up that it was nothing.

I hope that someday she calms down and can be your friend. I wanted the two of you together because I could see that you loved her very much. But at the same time I didn't think you were very good together, you always seemed tense when I saw you during that period. Distracted and worried and quite unlike your normal cheery self.

Friends is better. I've missed you, I've missed Damon and Graham and Dave, too. Graham, in particular, made an effort to be my friend after you and I broke up, but it became difficult for both of us. I'm glad that we can all laugh together again.

Have I mentioned how much I love the new album? Love it. Its extraordinary. I listen to it all the time and always find something else new to like, a turn of phrase, a buried bass track. What did they do to you, darling?

I'm looking forward to doing this video with you lot. Altho part of me is terrified. The Charms video was just me and a camera, following them around the city, this one is sets and lighting and camera crews and atmosphere and way too many faxes back and forth between me and London right now.

But I see you reclining on a red velvet couch, louche as always. All the little girls will scream.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: red velvet?

And me? If I'm smoking, and drop an ash, will I go up in flames? Rather hard to be louche when you're on fire.

Glad that you like the new effort. I rather do, as well, but don't tell. You know Damon will be impossible if I dare to praise his lyrical genius.

'The Secret Garden' is rather dark, isn't it? Did you know it was all about sex when you read it as a little girl?

You're right, I didn't read it as a child. It was a girly book, my sister read it. I didn't read much fiction as a lad, I read about the stars. (That is, until I got to art school, and Graham taught me how to be an existentialist.)

But you know me- I can never resist a saucy novel, especially if it's repressed Victorian sex. I found quite a nice copy at my favourite bookstore. You know the store- the one near the British Museum with all the rare manuscripts in the window. We were there many times. This copy is from the 40s, I believe. Lovely illustrations. Also got the other one, same printing.

Mmmmm. I can just imagine your face right now. I might possibly even be convinced to let you have them, if you are *extremely* nice to me when you get home.

If, that is, you have figured out what home is to you yet?

Being with your family, I imagine you have. I never actually saw the Evesham homestead, do you realise that? I have only ever met your parents that one time that we were near Cincinnati, wherever we were on that tour. Absolutely charming people- you could do worse than to become your mum, Emmie.

And I am sure when you get back to London you will have dozens of pictures of the wonder niece to show me. Hundreds, perhaps. Does the child in question have any idea how fortunate she is, to be photographed by the illustrious Emma Evesham?

At least she doesn't have a ridiculous name like Atlanta.

Why so soon over with Tony? I get the impression that you like him.

Hate to break it to you, darling, but I think the only thing Liam ever notices about any woman is their tits. Not that yours aren't spectacular, but then again, they were splashed all over the tabloids.

I don't know if I convinced Kate that we didn't sleep together. Believe me, I tried. But I don't think she was even willing to listen. She was ready to go, regardless of whether or not I actually cheated on her. You know how Kate is when she makes up her mind, and god knows what Hirsty had been telling her.

The truly ironic thing about the entire relationship is that after I accused her of sleeping with Peter, and she ended it by accusing me of sleeping with you, it turned out that neither of us actually did a thing. Given our collective pasts, it was surely a miracle that we managed to be faithful to one another, and neither of us even realised it at the time.

I'm looking forward to the video, we all are. It will be nice to work with someone that we know so well. There will be none of that settling in feeling, of sort of wandering around awkwardly, putting out the metaphorical feelers and getting to know one another.

Besides, they say you promise to keep the shoot to only one day. Hooray! I really hate it when shoots drag on for days and days, mentioning no names, Mr. Damien Bloody Hirst. It's so intolerably dull... Nothing but hurry up and wait.

I loved the Charms video, they'd better not reject it. It was brilliant work.

By the way, have I ever told you how much I like your work? I don't usually pay attention to such things, but your photos always jump off the news stands to me.

Alexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: why thank you

for the complement on my work. It means a lot of me, but then you were always very supportive of my photography. Remember that portfolio you gave me that Christmas? I still use it on occasion. All the pictures of Blur that used to be in it are gone, tho, because I have much better work to show. I need to do a still session with you lot, when can we do that?

I'll make sure we get flame retardant velvet on the couch, OK?

You're right, I'm completely drooling over the old editions of the Burnett books. They're both dark, and no I didn't know that the Secret Garden was about sex. I was a sheltered little suburban girl in this bedroom that I am now sitting in. My battered copies of both books are still on the bookshelves, even.

I like a Little Princess better, I don't know why. Its all about redemption and imagination and faith. And sex, too, probably. All the Victorian books were.

You're right again, I took a hundred pictures of Emily today. I'm not joking. I took four rolls of 24 before I could stop myself. She is beyond perfect, Alex. She brings tears to my eyes, she's so gorgeous. I'm head over heels in love with her, and it kills me that I don't get to live near her.

Yeah, I'd hate it here after about a week, but I'd get to be near my Emily. I'm so jealous of Astrid, she gets to see her every day.

Oh, she's going to be so spoiled, this little girl. I made Tricia swear to me that if she ever needed anything for Emily, to call me. Not that Rob and Tricia can't provide for her, but their budget doesn't allow for things like, oh, say, ponies. I'm going to be the aunt that only appears a few times a year, but every time with armloads of presents.

Oh my god, she is so beautiful, have I mentioned that? She has the biggest, bluest eyes I have ever seen, wispy blond hair that is soft with that great baby smell, and the best giggle. I kiss her all over and she giggles and giggles and giggles.

Sorry, what else were we talking about...

Don't remind me that my breasts were splashed all over the tabloids. Did your parents see them? Its so fucking embarassing. They've been so good, told me they love me and all that, but we keep talking around the issue that their perfect, demure, sweet daughter was fucking NAKED on the COVER of newspapers, practically having SEX with her boyfriend.

They asked after you, wondered how you are dealing with being NAKED on the COVER of newspapers, practically having SEX with your girlfriend.

arrrrrrgggghhhhhhh....

such a visit home, I tell you. Talking about my life with my parents, but trying to avoid sex, whereas Astrid and Tricia are full of giggles and wanting all the details of me and Tony.

Tony and I ended our fling for lots of reasons. It got to the point where we had to ask one another if it should continue once we left NYC, and the answer turned out to be no. It was sweet while it lasted, tho.

Know what? I think you and Kate deserved one another. You both got a chance to be the insecure one in the relationship, not the one off cheating. Things happen for a reason, and this was yours. Figure out what fidelity should mean.

Speaking of whom, when did you see the Charms video?

The shoot will only be a day, I swear to you. Its going to be simple, hopefully. I might bring Damon back for close-ups, depends. But he won't care. He loves the attention.

Oh, and I know what home means, don't worry. You're right, home's what you make of it. This is home, and London will be home just as soon as I get out of that god awful rock star apartment. I live in the one fucking soulless building in London. I want a little house, and a darkroom, and a garden, and a cat. Maybe two.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: Dull soulless flats

It truly is a rock star flat, isn't it? About as opposite from you as I can possibly imagine. It really was a folly of Jarvis' to even buy it, he fled back to Katie's the moment she would allow him, didn't he? But then again, he's always been very keen on buying ridiculous things at jumble sales and regretting it later. It's just a bit easier to pawn off posh flats on your friends than glass cats and ugly jumpers, I suppose.

A house in London, that I can see you in. I don't know, I think I will forever picture you in your old flat, we spent a lot of time there together.

What does the Evesham homestead look like? I can just imagine your bedroom; a monument to all your past and present achievements, your softball trophies on the shelves, the tabloid covers on the walls, mais oui?

'A Little Princess' is most assuredly about sex in one way or another. Come on, honestly- why was the elderly gentleman giving her presents all the time? Victorians and their filthy minds. It's all Freud, I tell you.

Emily sounds lovely, I can see why you're loathe to leave her. I'm sure you will be the favourite aunt, bringing presents and full of exotic stories. She's a lucky little girl, having all these wonderful aunts in her life.

Of course my parents saw the photos. You have no idea, the entire extended family had to call to talk about them, all the neighbours came round my mum's house. Oh, it was ghastly, all being so absurdly supportive, like a cartoon or an Ayckbourne play gone horribly wrong, dancing their way around everything, making everything worse through being so damned English. You've got to love 'em. It didn't precisely help my mental state, post evil break-up.

Speaking of evil break-ups, why did you and Tony have to end the relationship in New York? What was it? You couldn't get your head around long distance relationships? You just never get that into rap music? Do tell!

And why do I get the terrible feeling that you don't have an awful lot of sympathy for me over Kate leaving me a shattered shell of a man? Getting my comeuppance, I can almost hear you saying.

Oh, and by the way, I saw the Charms video at our last meeting with the record company. Should I not have?

I'm holding you to the one day promise for the shoot.

When do you come home?

Alexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: I have sympathy!

I don't think it was your comeuppance.

Yes I do. You deserved it, and we both know that. But that doesn't mean that I relish the fact that you're unhappy. I certainly wouldn't be trading these emails with you if I didn't like you.

And its probably best that we don't go into that any farther, for the sake the friendship we've been trying pretty hard to build.

Let's see... OK, the Evesham homestead.

Its a typical suburban home, really. Living room, kitchen, dining room, a rarely used front room. Staircase off the front room to the upstairs. Four bedrooms. One's a guest room, one was always the study, and my room. Mom and Dad have the master suite, they redid the bathroom this summer, it was very exciting.

My bathroom still sucks, its tiny. But the tub is big, good for long bubble baths with trashy romance novels, which was one of my favorite activities as a teen.

My bedroom is not a shrine to my accomplishments. The softball trophies are in the china cabinet, and there are only two.

I have Duran posters on the wall, tho, which is so fucking surreal that I sorta like it. Its just one poster, a huge one that I bought on the '89 tour, its very arty. Blues and greens, the boys are nearly shadows.

If I think too hard about when I bought it, and lying on this bed with the girls making up ridiculous scenarios of meeting the band, and then consider the fact that I have three emails from John that need to be answered, and one from Nick, I get really freaked out. So I don't think about it too hard and I will answer the emails on my flight back to my surreal life in London.

It is so bizarre when one's dreams come true. I can almost understand why Kate attempts to destroy her happiness, at least she's doing it before it all just falls apart.

Anyhow... back to the room. The walls in here are pale green, the curtains and comforter have ivy patterns. So the poster works. Light wood furniture, double bed, dresser, desk, bookshelves. I'm at the desk now writing email.

I can look out the window and see Bayley's parents house. Her room is the one facing the street, like mine is, we used to talk on the phone and look out our windows at one another. I would sit at my desk, doing homework, and whenever the phone rang I would look over to her window before picking it up, seeing if it was her. She was always calling wanting my answers to the math homework. She was never good at math, she still calls me to help balance her checkbook. Do you know how fucking difficult that is, when I can't see her receipts or where she added 2 and 2 and got five?

Of course you don't, you never balance your checkbook, you bloody pop star.

Anyway... Astrid's mom used to live four doors down from Bayley's house, but she moved several years ago. Tricia's family is around the corner, in a house twice the size of ours, but then again, they have seven kids. Tricia now lives around the corner again from them. Its about a two minute walk from here. Astrid lives in the big bad city of Cincinnati.

Did I ever tell you that Tricia's family owns a restaurant? I must have. A nice little Italian place, you'd like it, they do great pizza. It's a five minute walk the other way, on the main road. We had dinner there tonight, all of us but Bayley, her mom and dad, my parents, Astrid, a good number of Tricia's clan. I sat next to Emily, she giggled and grinned at me all night.

Have I mentioned to you how much I love that child?

I wish there was a way I could live my life and be near all these people. But I guess I made the decision a long time ago not to remain here. Bayley was always the one that was dying to leave for the east coast, and I followed her because it seemed as good a choice as any.

But now I don't quite fit here any longer. They all knew gossip that I didn't, there were in jokes that I didn't share. I tryed to make an AbFab joke and realized that no one would get it. So I did my best Pats impression to Emily, and she giggled on cue.

Not that I entirely fit in London, either. Especially now that I'm having visa troubles. I need to marry a citizen, then it'll be OK.

We're meeting about the video next week, aren't we? Oh, I suppose its fine that you saw the video, its just that I haven't heard much about it. I was sorta expecting lots of 'oh, darling, we looooooovvvvvveeee it's. Spoiled by being wooed for Swirl, I guess.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: Swirl?

Being wooed by Swirl, no less. To do what, pray tell, you hot and in-demand media vixen?

I'll make sure I tell our MVC rep to rave at you about the Charms video. I did hear that the release date of the single has been messed around a bit, no one seems to know exactly what's going on with it, but I assure you, everyone thinks the video is striking.

Are you sure it isn't too surreal to have Duran posters in your room? Given that you babysit for the leBon children and flirt with John Taylor now? Then again, we've always both been amused by the surreality of fame, haven't we? Yet another thing we've always had in common.

I do enjoy hearing about your formative years. I don't think we ever talked much about them when we were together. Too busy living in the present, I suppose.

I didn't even realise how close you all lived. I'm sure you told me, but not in that sort of detail. I can just see baby Em and baby Bayley leaning out the windows to one another, it's a perfectly adorable vision. Did you ever have one of those phones that was a long string with two cups at the ends? I tried to make one based on an illustration in my "Great Big Book Of Tell Me Why" but it never worked.

Would you really have been happy if you had moved back home after college? I always got the impression that you found it a trifle dull, even stifling, out there in Ohio. We all make choices, and you chose travelling all over the world and drinking with the beautiful people over a husband and a picket fence and 2.3 children in the suburbs or what have you.

I do believe you have mentioned once or twice that you're ever so slightly fond of Emily, but I don't suppose you mind if you mention it again.

Any handsome and available candidates in mind to help you solve those visa troubles?

Alexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: Any suggestions?

For candidates willing to marry an American so that she can exploit his citizenship status?

I bet Graham would do it. Hmm. I could get the husband and the picket fence *and* travelling with the beautiful people...

Yes, we all make choices. I'm not unhappy with mine, I just miss my friends and family. But if I was in Ohio, Bayley wouldn't be, and I would miss her. Not to speak of all the people I never would have known if I hadn't moved to London.

Amazing, how things happen.

But I made my choices, and here I am in London again, in my soulless flat. My flight was long and horrible, I never got a chance to check my email, and you know that kills me. I had 25 messages on my phone service, a pile of faxes, and Susan was pulling her hair out, because I didn't realize the battery in my cell phone was dead.

All this adds up to I need to get to my studio pronto, jet lag or no. A million things due tomorrow. Yeah, right.

I think my new kick ass computer was delivered while I was gone, tho. Mega Mac, with every bell and whistle my geeky little heart could desire.

Video meeting, me, the band, the record company, tomorrow. A new and improved plan will be on the table. Storyboards! Flip charts! Interactive media with laser pointers and the track playing in the background! Woo-hoo, as Damon would say. Do you realize you may have created a monster with that track? Far too catchy.

Em

To: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

From: emeves@hotmail.com

Subject: why aren't you answering your phone?

I set up my new computer, zipped around the web for a while, then searched on 'Emma Evesham'

I suggest you do the same.

They making money off our photos, Alex. About a million porn sites are advertising our photos, and this time there are no strategically placed black bars. And they're profiting! I took those fucking pictures, and not only are they turning them into something sordid and ugly, they are MAKING MONEY off of it.

I spent the last hour on the phone with a solicitor and my agent, and she says I have a better case with you, since we are both in the photos. If we sue them together, we can prove hardship or something.

I have a strong case that they were stolen, and you're not allowed to profit off of stolen property, but we can file that we've been caused great mental distress and make a ton of money and get these sites closed down.

I'm so mad I'm still shaking, and I saw the first ones two hours ago. I got more than 100 hits on my name, almost all of those were these porn sites.

Why is no one around? Katie isn't returning my calls, either.

I will do this alone if I have to, but your help would be appreciated.

Em

To: emeves@hotmail.com

From: AJSexmeal@blur.co.uk

Subject: Where and when?

Tell me, I'll be there.

Call, if you get my messages. Where are you? Hopefully out with Katie Sutton getting pickled.

Alex