"He's what?" I shrieked, and she grinned, pushing in her chair and giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"Caller ID is giving me the hotel number. I do believe the bunny is surprising me. JC, terribly nice to meet you. I'm sure we'll see each other again?"

JC stood up, taking her hand and kissing it. "Absolutely."

She practically floated out of the restaurant, and I smiled after her.

"Is she really that happy about Nick Carter?" JC asked, and I turned back to him, laughing.

"Yes, she is. I'm not listening to anything you have to say against him, either, because nothing he told me about you is true."

He laughed, and I could feel myself blushing. "What did he say about me?"

"Nothing," I shook my head. I had definitely had too much too drink. Had Nick ever said anything about JC to me? Somehow, I knew that Nick didn't like him. Or was that just boyband rivalry?

"Come on," JC pleaded, and I shrugged.

"Well, he did me how to pronounce your last name," I offered. "Which is good, since I tend to use it to check into hotels."

He grinned, taking another sip of his wine. "Funny, I've been using 'Packard' the last few weeks."

Was that a flirt? No. That was a joke.

I glanced back at him, trying to figure it out, but the waitress appeared with our desserts. We told her to leave the third and we'd try it. JC considered the plates, and then grabbed Rachel's and put it in between us. "This definitely looks the best."

I nodded. "She's very good at desserts."

"Does Nick appreciate that?" he wondered, and I considered him for a moment.

"Yeah, he appreciates her. She's taken, dude."

Best to just dissuade him, right? They'd been flirting, but I didn't want him to think that she might consider another boybander.

He met my eyes and burst into laughter. "I'm not interested in her, James."

"Oh. Well, OK. Good."

Fuck. That was embarrassing. I shouldn't have said anything.

But I wasn't imagining the flirting, was I? "Why wouldn't you be interested in her?"

"What?" he asked through a mouthful of chocolate cake.

"Isn't every straight male in the fucking world interested in her?"

"So I've heard." He smiled, looking down at our plate and carefully cutting off another bite of cake with his fork. "But since I'm not straight, I'm not interested."

It took me a minute to process that, and then I stared at him and dropped my fork.

Smooth. I was so fucking smooth.

I grabbed the fork back and took another drink. At least my gaydar wasn't failing me. It was dinging like mad, but I figured that was my wishful thinking.

I glanced back at him and he was trying not to laugh. "Shut up," I grumbled. "I'm just a tad surprised."

He shrugged, finishing his bite of cake. "It's 10 percent of the population, right? I'm the statistical norm for the boy bands."

I laughed too loudly at that, and quieted myself to a giggle, sharing a smile with him.

That felt nice. He had a smile that lit up his whole face. "How do you…" I started, not sure how to finish my sentence. "Don't you have a girlfriend?"

"Did. A friend, but she met a real boy, so we had a pretend break up." He met my eyes. "There are more gay fans than you'd expect."

"Do you pay them all off? Because believe me, I know people who know everything, and you are not the list."

"I'm careful. I mean, can't ruin the image."

I considered him for a moment. "Who knows? Does your band know?"

"Yeah. Justin firmly believes I'm bi and I'll outgrow it. They didn't ask me to keep it quiet." He added quickly before I could say anything, "I did that myself. When you're selling non threatening sexuality to little girls, being gay pretty much fucks that up."

I shook my head. "Thank god we're not doing that. Hell, with Rachel up front, no one much cares about the gay bassist."

"Come on. You don't have cute little boys throwing themselves at you?"

"I got more action before we got famous," I complained. "Now all the boys want Rachel. Figures. When she was single, they all wanted me."

"For the longest time, we just got old creepy guys. But now… we get the hot ones. I pick closeted little stockbrokers who think of one night with me as an experiment, they'd never tell anyone."

"Dude. Does the sex suck or what?"

He raised an eyebrow at me. "I've learned to be a good teacher."

I raised an eyebrow back at him. "I've been practicing for a while. I could probably teach you a few tricks."

Leaning towards me over the table, he rested his chin in his hand. "I could be a willing pupil for the evening…"

As a rule, I wasn't into casual sex. But one night with the hot one from N Sync… I could make an exception. I tried not to whimper. I should be the cool one here, right? I had to know things he didn't.

I knew nothing about how to do this in secret. I flew out of the closet in college and never looked back. "Where are you staying?" I asked carefully.

He settled back in his chair with a smile. "They've got us all at the Wyndam, don't they?"

"You have the penthouse or something, don't you?"

He shrugged. "I have some… amenities. Wanna see how the other half lives?"

"Man, I thought just being at the Wyndam was cool enough. You boy bands get all the perks, I've seen Nick's hotel rooms."

"Have you?" he flirted, and I laughed.

"Only to drag Rachel out of them. That would throw off your statistical analysis, wouldn't it?"

"Someone has to actually be bi, doesn't he? And I know it's no one in my band, believe me."

"I've often wished it was Kevin," I mused, and he nodded with me.

"Yeah… but it's probably AJ. Definitely not Brian."

"Might be Howie. He's quiet, you should look out for the quiet ones."

"Yeah, that's what I am. And you. Jeremy's the control freak, and Darien's the flirt, and Rachel's… Rachel. So you have to be the quiet one."

I shrugged. "I guess." Was I?

What was I doing? I couldn't believe I was doing this. I never did this. I had never, ever been with someone who was actually 'gay'. I had to pick guys that would never tell, and gay boys never fit that profile. But I was throwing myself at this guy. Words were coming out of my mouth before I realized I was saying them.

He had to understand, right? He was out, but he knew what it was like to be in a boyband because of Nick, maybe.

What was I doing?

"How do you do it?"

He looked at me, licking ice cream off his spoon. Jesus. What a tongue. Was I just doing this because he was so fucking hot? What if I was wrong and he told all his friends and the rumors started? Was I going to throw everything away because I was horny?

"Do what?"

"Be… out. Everyone likes to tell me that it will ruin everything."

"Probably would, for you. You're selling something different than we are. Just makes us quirky. It's my thing. Jeremy has indie cred, Darien has tattoos, Rachel has breasts… I'm gay. I had enough trouble coming out of the closet, I am not about to go through it again in public."

"You had trouble?" I had to ask. He seemed so confident in it. It was such a non-issue, I had images of a 5-year-old James proclaiming 'I'm here, I'm queer, get used to it!'

He snickered, taking another bite of cake. "Oh, yeah. Ask Rachel. I have very old, very Catholic parents."

"Old?"

"They're in their 60s. I was a miracle baby. But I was never what they wanted me to be, and…" he drifted off, suddenly lost in his thoughts.

"And what?" I prompted. I couldn't imagine telling my parents. That was possibly more terrifying than telling our fans.

He shook his head, smiling at me. "Let me put it this way. They really thought that Rachel and I were gonna get married and stay on Long Island forever. It was very… difficult for me to admit that I was gay, because I hate disappointing them. I have a bachelor's in biology because they wanted me to go to medical school. It's like that. I didn't go to medical school, and I like boys, and I dye my hair." I started to say something and he laughed, shaking his head "That's why I don't apologize for it to anyone else, because I've apologized to them enough. On a happier note, you should really have more of this cake before I eat it all."

I took a bite, letting the subject drop. This was a one-night stand. I did not need to know his life story. Although it was nice to know that he wasn't quite as confident as I thought. Made me slightly less frightened to go through with this. We were quiet for a moment, finishing our desserts, and then he looked at me, sucking ice cream off his spoon again. Tease.

"So, do I have to sneak up to your floor or something?"

"No. We can be buddies, right? Go up to my room so you can see how the other half lives… no one needs to see you leave much later this evening." Much later. Maybe in the morning. I wanted to fully experience that tongue. And other things.

"Are we done here?" he asked, almost innocently.

I caught the waiter's eye and signaled for the check, pulling out my wallet as he approached. James started to dig for money and I waved him away. "I've got it."

"Rachel disappeared without paying. Typical," he mused, and I laughed, handing over my credit card without even looking at the bill.

"So why is Nick here?" I asked. I didn't know Nick very well, but I did know he was pretty much a shit to his last girlfriend. Then again, his last girlfriend was now our biggest fan, and threw herself at me every chance she could. Maybe I shouldn't believe everything she told me about him.

"Hopefully to say he's sorry. They were supposed to spend this weekend together, then we got the MTV thing at the last minute. He went a little nuts."

"Are they serious?" Someone as cool as Rachel, with Nick? I couldn't see it. He was a punk ass kid, always playing practical jokes on us whenever he could. He had Britney's cell phone number for a while, that had been annoying, to say the least. Justin might kill him someday.

James shrugged. "Seems it. She deserves someone to adore her, and he does."

"Did I hear he was on tour with you for a while this summer?"

He nodded. "He was fine. Jeremy was a jealous freak, but Nick was cool."

"If you say so," I mused, and he laughed.

"We're not here to discuss Nick, now are we?"

"Definitely not," I answered, scribbling my name on the receipt when the waiter put it in front of me. Let's go, now. I wanted to slam my hotel room door shut and attack him.

The ride back to the hotel was a blur. I knew I was talking about stupid things, but I was thinking about how he would taste, and how his skin would feel against mine. I signed autographs in the lobby, and he went up in the elevator ahead of me, meeting me on my floor with a laugh five minutes later. "Terribly James Bond, dear."

I shrugged. It was a game to him, but this was my life. There couldn't even be a hint of suspicion or everything might come crashing down. He slipped in the door as I opened it, wandering around the room when I turned from locking the door behind us. "Way better than my room. Dude, look at this view!" He went over to the balcony, throwing open the doors. I'd seen that view. I wanted the view of him naked in my bed now.

I joined him on the balcony, looking at him as he looked at the sun setting over the ocean. Where should I touch him first? Take his hand? Kiss him? Grab his ass?

It was really good ass. It wore jeans well. I'd been admiring it ever since I saw their video for the first time. His ass, and his eyes, and his goofy smile… I'd been admiring every part of him. There was a tattoo on his shoulder, and I reached up, tracing it lightly. "In a world full of surprising fireworks, and sudden silence," in a spiral. "Is that where the band name comes from?" I asked him.

"It's an obscure Duran Duran reference. We each have one." Our eyes met and I had no idea what to do next. He started to move towards me, and then glanced out at the beach. "Possibly journalists with telephoto lenses out there? We should move inside." I followed him as he went back into the room and shut the doors to the balcony. Then he grabbed my shirt and pulled me up to him, kissing me deeply.

Oh. My. God.

I didn't kiss much. It was all about the sex, and kissing was just in the way of the ultimate destination. But his tongue touched mine and my knees buckled. This was going to blow my mind, wasn't it?

I fumbled for his zipper, aching to touch his cock, but he grabbed my hands and stepped away with a smile. "Are we in a hurry?" He didn't wait for my answer, but went back to the bedroom and I just watched him go, catching my breath. I usually was in a hurry. The longer I was alone with a guy in my room, the more rumors might spread. But no one saw us come in here besides my bodyguard. I just told the fans downstairs that I was tired. There was no reason to hurry this.

"Shit!" I heard him yell, and found him in the bathroom. He grinned when he saw me. "I could fit in this tub! We could both fit in this tub, that never happens!"

He was very tall, taller than me. "How tall are you?"

"6'4." I'm a circus freak. The boys like it though. I make them feel helpless and girly," he teased, wrapping his arms around me. "Do you like the girly vibe?"

"No, not my style."

"Good," he smiled. "I'm not good with drag queens, had a brief fling with one about two years ago. Very amusing at dinner, the sex was not what I was looking for."

"What do you look for in sex, then?" I asked, looking for a clue. Not quick, I'd figured that out.

"You'll find out soon enough, darling," he purred, leaning down to kiss me again. He backed me up so I was leaning against the bathroom counter, trapped against him. I was not used to this. I usually had to lead the way through my sexual encounters, this was not my style.

He slipped his hands under my shirt, stroking the skin of my chest delicately, and I gave up. What did I know? I had quick, marginally satisfying sex with closeted boys who were impressed by my fame. This was why I picked James tonight. I deserved to have sex with an actual gay man once in my life.

And he was amazing. At least he was amazing at kissing. I'd never been kissed this thoroughly before, his tongue was aggressive, meeting mine, and he broke away, nibbling at my neck until I gasped. I felt him smile against my throat, and then he moved back, pulling my shirt over my head. "Okay, we might need to hurry," he sighed, running his hand down my stomach to the button of my jeans. "Is the rest of you this perfect?"

"I work out," I smirked, and he shook his head, unbuttoning my pants slowly.

"I don't, and I don't want any judgements."

Hardly. "You've got such a skinny ass, what could be wrong?"

His hands stopped moving, his palm flat against my cock. "I could walk away right now," he murmured. "But you don't want me to do that, do you?"

I shook my head. "You're fucking gorgeous, James. Stay."

He grinned. He had a goofy, endearing grin that sorta ruined his sex god image. "Better." He finished undoing my pants, sliding them off my hips. "Do I hear a rumor that you never wear the same pair of underwear twice?"

"I don't believe in laundry," I told him.

"Freak. You are a total freak," he deadpanned, leaning down to kiss me again.

"I'm a freak in clean underwear," I protested, making him smile again.

"You're a freak in no underwear right now. A sight I never believed I'd be lucky enough to see…" he sighed, looking at me for a long moment. "Damn. All that time mooning over 'NSync videos, and now you're live and in the flesh. This must be a very early Christmas present."

"You mooned over 'NSync videos?" I exclaimed, and he looked at me, an expression of mock horror on his face.

"Oh, no! Found out! I'm actually just a groupie. I'm going to tell everyone!" he giggled, running out of the room. I stepped out of my pants and followed him, tackling him onto the bed.

"I had better be your favorite!" I told him, tugging at his shirt until it came off.

"No, it's Howie. Joey? Who was the one with the buzz cut on the last album?"

"Me, you freak!" I laughed, and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I like your hair long. Rachel and I have mooned over the 'Pop' video many, many times."

"I liked your hair blue," I said, brushing it out of his eyes. "What's the real color?"

"Brown. Boring," he answered, whimpering lightly as I ran my tongue along his jawline. He had great bones, strong, a big nose, firm jaw. Just how flexible was that jaw, I wondered. I moved my hands to the waistband of his jeans, and this time he didn't stop me, lifting his hips as I pulled his pants off.

And here we were. Naked on his bed. What to do first? He had an incredible body… muscles I didn't know existed on the human form. He reached for my cock and I flipped him over, straddling his hips. He kept rushing things, and I intended to enjoy every second of this evening. Besides, if he touched me again, I might just come way too quickly, and that would be embarrassing. I'd promised to teach him some things, didn't I?

"Do you have… supplies?" I asked quietly, watching as his nipples hardened under my touch.

He caught his breath, running his fingers through his hair. I couldn't believe how turned on he was, we'd barely done anything, but I could see it in his eyes. He really needed to pick guys with a little more experience, if I was all that. "I have to get up," he sighed.

I almost made a lame joke, but instead I just rolled over, freeing him. He stood up, and then looked around the room, seeming a bit lost, finally going over to his suitcase in the corner and opening it. It was empty, but I enjoyed the sight of his ass as he bent over. "Damnit," he said to himself, then came back to the bed and opened a drawer in the bedside table. I rolled over, looking inside, and laughed.

"How many kinds of condoms does one man need? Are they part of your rider, or do you really like cruising sex shops?" The last time I saw this many condoms was my first Christmas with Michael, he'd given me a box full of just about every color, flavor and size. We went through them in about a month, if I remembered correctly…

Stop thinking about Michael, James. Think about the pop god sitting next to you with nothing but a smile now. "I like to be prepared," he protested, and I sat up, kissing him.

"Do you kick me out in an hour, or do we have some time to put these to good use?" I asked, and he looked away from me, considering. I had never had to sneak around to have sex, but it made this a little dangerous and exciting. I probably wouldn't want to make a habit of it, but for one night, it was amusing.

"We have time. I don't think anyone saw us come in. We can worry about someone seeing you leave when I allow you to," he teased, glancing back at me.

I kissed him again, leaning him back on the bed. "One more question and we can concentrate on other things. EMI makes us get tested every six months, and Rachel would have me tested every other day if I let her. I'm clean, never even a false positive. You?"

"Same."

"Good," I murmured, kissing his neck. "Because oral sex with a condom just takes the joy out of it."

He gasped, leaning up on his elbows to see me, and I stopped what I was doing, looking up at him. "I have flavored ones."

"I've tried every brand known to man, JC, and they are all disgusting. We're clean. We can do blowjobs without a barrier, I promise. Have you never?"

"Not never. But usually…" he trailed off, and I shook my head.

"Is there a comparison? Really? C'mon, you're having sex with an actual gay man tonight, throw caution to the winds!"

He groaned, falling back against the pillows. "Tell me I'm not going to regret this in the morning."

"I promise. I am going to do everything in my power to blow your fucking mind."

I kissed my way down his chest, and by the time I took his cock in my mouth, he was panting for me. He screamed as my tongue swirled around the head, and I had to smile. This was almost too easy, remove the condom and he was done. What was he going to do when I fucked him? See God?

"Christ, James, that is so good…" he moaned, and I felt his fist slam into the mattress near my head. I sucked harder and he screamed again. Wasn't he worried someone would hear us? He moaned my name over and over again as I cupped his balls, devouring his cock, and it only took a few minutes until he came. I kept him in my mouth, tonguing him lightly, until I felt that shudder that meant he'd had enough and moved away, lying next to him.

He kissed me as soon as I was within reach, sighing against me as we broke apart. "That was definitely one of the best blow jobs of my life."

I laughed, brushing the hair away from his face. "Dude, you need to pick better partners. That was nothing."

He kissed me again, pushing me onto my back. "You underestimate yourself."

I laughed, trying not to jump off the bed when he ran his tongue along my tattoo. He laid his body on top of mine and I tried to grab his ass, to hold his hips against me, but he just smiled and moved lower, kissing my chest and stomach. Sighing, I relaxed into the bed, knowing I would come just as quickly as he did. Hell… I reminded myself of who he was, JC from 'NSync, not some little fan boy, and I could feel myself get harder. Did that make me shallow? Did I give a fuck as he took my cock into his mouth?

I didn't care about anything else as he sucked on me firmly, his hot wet mouth surrounding me. Christ. He was definitely gay. This was a man that loved to suck cock. I loved that in my sexual partners. It was such a plus. "God, Jace," I groaned, grabbing a handful of his gorgeous hair. He moaned against me, I guess he liked the hair grab. So I buried both my hands in his hair, feeling his head move as my cock felt every little thing his tongue was doing.

It might have been an hour, or two seconds, but I heard someone screaming his name. It had to be me, but I was coming too hard to be sure. He stayed with me, swallowing- I wasn't sure if he was going to do that- only letting me go when I told him to stop. I dragged him back up to me, wrapping my arms around his body and kissing him. "If you only have bad sex, who taught you to do that?"

"Do onto others, James. One of the reasons I've never figured out girls. How am I supposed to know what they might like?"

I laughed. "Rachel will tell you. Rachel should write a book someday."

"Why does she tell you, if you don't care?"

I smiled at him. "We tell each other everything. Her boyfriends should probably thank me for her mad blowjob skills."

"I think if Nick thought about that too hard, he'd lose the ability to enjoy it," JC said with a laugh, and I giggled.

"Doubtful. I'm sure they're in this hotel somewhere right now enjoying everything I've taught her."

"We've only got tonight," he said, his voice growing deeper. "And I think you've still got a lot to teach me."

"Gladly," I thought, as he kissed me. I could learn to have closeted one-night stands. Happily.

Chapter added 1/2/04 Email feedback to The Paperbag Princess

Chapter 1: Our Heros Meet Chapter 2: Let Them Eat Cake! Chapter 3: VMA's Chapter 4: Day Off Chapter 5: Three Small Words Chapter 6: Complicated

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